Smart ADHD Life Stories with Libby Langley
By Ian Anderson Gray with Libby Langley
Episode 6
Duration: 1 hour 11 minutes 35 seconds
Episode Theme:
May 9, 2024
Have you ever wondered how ADHD and autism can shape the life and career of an entrepreneur? Are you curious about the tools and strategies that can help manage these conditions effectively? What does it truly mean to embrace neurodiversity not just in life, but also in the professional world? Dive into these questions and more in this enlightening episode of the Smart ADHD Podcast.
In today's episode, I sit down with the incredible Libby Langley, a coach, author, and podcast host who has been profoundly influential in the business world, particularly among entrepreneurs grappling with ADHD and autism. Libby shares her personal journey of late diagnosis and how it reshaped her understanding of herself and her business approach. We delve into the challenges and advantages of being neurodiverse, exploring everything from emotional sensitivities to unique entrepreneurial strengths.
In this episode
[0:00] Welcome to the Smart ADHD Podcast
[1:05] Libby Langley’s ADHD and Autism Journey
[5:58] Early Encounters with ADHD and Autism
[14:19] Navigating Life, Love, and Business with Neurodiversity
[21:18] Impact of Diagnosis on Personal and Professional Life
[30:08] Embracing Neurodiversity: From Challenges to Superpowers
[38:13] Navigating Stigma and Misconceptions Around Neurodiversity
[40:02] Personal Journey: Embracing Neurodiversity and Overcoming Challenges
[41:39] The Impact of Sharing and Community Support
[48:42] Exploring Creativity and Entrepreneurship with ADHD and Autism
[52:05] Strategies and Tools for Managing ADHD and Autism
[58:41] Holistic Approaches and Therapies for ADHD and Autism
[1:07] Encouragement and Advice for Others on the Neurodiverse Spectrum
Join us as we explore these insights, shedding light on the empowering stories of those living a Smart ADHD life. Don’t forget to reach out, find your tribe, and take a step towards understanding and embracing your unique traits and talents.
Watch Episode 6
About Libby Langley
Libby Langley has been coaching business owners since 2011, in her unique no-BS style. She’s supported over 6,000 entrepreneurs, giving them the confidence to grow, and – above all – be truly happy in their life and business.
She is an Amazon bestselling author, and the popular podcast host of Life In Business.
Transcript
[0:00] Ian: Hello, I'm Ian Anderson Gray, and this is the smart ADHD podcast.
[0:14] Now if you're a smart, creative entrepreneur or business owner navigating your life with ADHD, This is the podcast for you. Now, I'm no ADHD expert, but I'm eager to share my story on what I've learned by talking with experts, as well as digging into the personal ADHD stories of successful creatives and entrepreneurs.
[0:37] I was diagnosed at age 46, and it answered so many questions in my life. But of course, that was in many ways, only the start of my journey. So let's learn together. Smart stories, smart strategies, smart ADHD.
[1:04] Hello, welcome to episode six of the Smart ADHD podcast. Well, this is the second Smart ADHD stories episode. And so last time we had Kerry Jordan going into sharing her story, her life, really navigating life with ADHD. And these episodes are longer, they're more raw, they're unedited, allowing people creatives to Entrepreneurs, business owners to share their story of how they've navigated their lives with ADHD.
[1:35] And I'm excited to share today's episode, which is with my good friend, Libby Langley. We met back in, Oh, I don't know, quite a long time ago, certainly over 10 years ago. And it's been amazing to hear her story. She was diagnosed with ADHD and autism, which came as a little bit of a shock to her, you'll find out in this episode.
[1:54] So without me jibbering on any longer, here is the episode with Libby Langley.
[1:58] Hello, Libby. Welcome to smart ADHD. How are you doing?
[2:02] Libby: I'm alright, it's lovely to see you again and thanks for having me on.
[2:06] I
[2:07] Ian: know it's, it's weird to be in front of computer screens. Cause we've met up quite a few times recently over the last few years in person, which is always nice. We've known each other for quite a few years. I was asking this question on Facebook, about how I. I first met people or when people first met me and I think it was it was some kind of Mastermind thing wasn't it that we met quite a few years ago and social media marketing world this big conference in san diego
[2:36] Libby: Yeah, we, the Mastermind was run by someone that I met on Twitter, who I first actually saw in the flesh. at Social Media Marketing World in 2013. So I think it was when I came back from that, that we did, we started the in person stuff. your business was so different, than I guess, mine was.
[2:58] And we were obviously younger and, Less gray and all of that. Fewer gray hairs back then. But but yeah, it's funny that the most, until recently, until I moved closer to you, the most we've engaged in person has been in the States, which is, weird, really.
[3:18] Ian: It is weird. Yeah, so obviously you're based like me in the uk. you're not too far geographically from me so I'm trying to remember back in those days, what were you doing business wise that's different. We'll get, back into like personal stories in a minute, but tell everyone who's watching and listening what it is that you're currently doing and compare that with maybe say 10 years ago when we first met.
[3:45] Libby: Yeah, what I do now is I do business coaching. So I work with very small businesses, one man, one, one woman, predominantly businesses to help them be better business owners and to work less to earn more and actually enjoy what they've created for themselves rather than just being on the hamster wheel of a job like business, which so many people create for themselves.
[4:06] And I see it time and time again, and that's morphed out of my journey, really my own personal. journey. And when I first started the business, I focused very much on social media, strategy, corporate social media and teaching people how to use social media. Cause it was good for, I started doing that in 2009.
[4:26] It was good fun back then, it was much easier. It was a much sort of simpler place to strategize in. And over the years, I've never been a die hard social media fan. I think it held to Huge part in the, world. And it's, a fantastic tool that's connected us as, a real example, but, but I don't like, I don't have the noise of it.
[4:49] So over the years I've moved more into business as a whole, because I love that. That, I love looking under the bonnet of people's businesses and helping them with their, what they, why they're in business, what they want to do and the numbers and how to make more profit and their marketing as well.
[5:07] But it's yeah, really, it really interests me. So in the context of the kind of neurodiversity, it's absolutely a special interest of mine as well as my business. I've, realized. Yeah.
[5:18] Ian: Yeah, and it's, and that's the funny thing, isn't it? It's so often like we find a hobby and then it becomes a business or business becomes a hobby. there's a lot of people I know who aren't neurodiverse.
[5:30] diverse.
[5:31] They, there's a kind of clear separation between the two and I try and do that, but I don't always do a very good job.
[5:39] so Let's talk about ADHD then, and with you, so we've talked about this a lot, it's not just ADHD with you, you're also diagnosed with autism as well, so you've got The two of them, which is fun and games, all the boxes text. So when did you let's, when did you first realize you had ADHD and or autism?
[6:06] what's, been your journey?
[6:07] Libby: So a couple of years ago, I guess I was like everyone, and it's a horrible, it's a horrible thing to, to admit, but I know that I'm not alone in this, that, society, we thought ADHD was the naughty kids at school, right? The naughty boys at school. And Autism was the weird kids at school, that's just, it's, really awful. I really struggled to say that because I'm describing myself, but I think that was that's what, I don't know what people thought in general, right? It just wasn't, it wasn't discussed and open. And, as recognized as is particularly in girls and women as it is now. And a couple of years ago, I must be three, it must be three years ago now. I'm in a, I'm in a community, kind of business, a money mindset, business growth community. And there were lots of people in that community. It's 99. 9 percent women. And. a lot of them are 40 plus, And there was a lot of conversation in there about ADHD. Few people have been diagnosed.
[7:18] And I'm like, oh, and, the more I started stuff like, but you're not a naughty boy. I don't know if I thought anything that literally, but I suppose it piqued my interest because it was surprising really. And I, so I, Scrolled all the memes, self diagnosed through, memes and just knew that kind of this explained so much about my brain and about how I'd lived my life to that point. And I just found the kindness I was able to give myself, and realized that I wasn't a complete failure or a massive disappointment like my, My family might have led me to believe and it was the way that my brain was different So I was quite comfortable and quite happy with that and we went to In early ish 2023, we went to, my husband and I went to a talk about ADHD in Sheffield. And, because it was an ADHD audience, everybody was just immediately best friends and talking to each other. And, the person next, the woman next to me, she said, she said, "And your autistic", and I'm like, excuse me, what? never had thought, I don't know. I just wasn't looking for any more answers, I suppose and So she said we'll do these tests and this is why I think it is do these online tests So I did the online test that she'd recommended and I was like, I've scored really highly on these Ah, so some more things are starting to make sense now and I paid for a private assessment and sure enough I'm like a grade A autistic person. And yeah, that was a real struggle for me. Actually, the ADHD, it's not the lack of formal diagnosis. I think it's my interpretation of it. The ADHD manifests itself with me in the, energy, the fuel, the brilliant brain. and the autism, I was just absolutely knocked for six with that diagnosis.
[9:19] It really impacted me, impacted my business, but it helped to understand myself better. And I, think of them as two, two sides of my brain, although obviously they're all in a big jumble in my brain. And the autism is the, it's the structure of the order, but it's the need for safety and understanding. And, things to be as I expect them to be. But the ADHD is like the, I am going on the rollercoaster as many times as I can. I'm gonna buy a new house because I just feel like it. It's the, it's, that kind of fun, fun side, but also that comes with the, You've bought a new house. Yeah, that sort of, there's a balance there, but I see them quite differently, and having them both, I think, helps me to meet in the middle, or maybe just be twice as what, I don't know, odd. Who knows. And it's really hard to judge yourself, isn't it? And, you'll, know this, that in the entrepreneurial community, once you start to, your kind of neurodiversity radar starts, you're like, yep. So we're not alone, right? We're, in the majority, I think, in the entrepreneurial community.
[10:41] Neurodivergent people.
[10:43] Ian: I think you're probably right there. and. Yeah, when you're with people who, whose brains work differently, I think we just get each other a little bit more, because we're so often we're misunderstood. And it's interesting what you're saying about the ADHD and the autism, it's almost as you're saying almost as if the autism kind of tempers the ADHD, probably.
[11:12] There's definitely ADHD traits, there's definitely autism traits, but there are some traits that are probably a little bit of both.
[11:20] And for me, it's interesting, I think I struggle with anxiety, and it's my anxiety that tempers my impulsivity. So the anxiety stops me from doing stupid things. Sometimes, not all the time. time.
[11:35] Can you maybe explain a little bit more about this kind of how autism and ADHD works in your brain and how they, how it works or doesn't work with each other?
[11:46] Yeah.
[11:49] Libby: I don't know. I
[11:50] have no idea, but, I suppose to think of, It's so hard to unpick your own brain.
[11:59] It's so hard because it's all you've ever known, right? And when you realize that perhaps it's slightly different to, I don't know, like your family or whoever, you example you're, brought up to follow, it's really quite, it's quite difficult to do that. But I think for me, like in the business context, it's, It is a really difficult question to answer, but in a business context, like I love being up on stage, right? I love doing keynotes and I love doing talks and, I've done, I've done kind of four or five in the last month or something, which is quite, high number for me.
[12:38] But I love that. And I love that kind of, I get that real energy from it. And I find it really, I find it really empowering and knowing that I'm helping people. So I love that. But then, don't knock on my door unless I know you're going to.
[12:59] it's, almost that there are so many rules about, around my behavior that it's really difficult for anyone to, to understand that.
[13:11] it's it's a joke that my husband and I have, and he's Oh, new rules. And I'm like, no, they've always been the rules. I just haven't had to verbalize it before. And it's just, but it's just, it's not like I'm a dictator in our house. It's just I need it to be like this in order to be able to live comfortably.
[13:27] And it's just. I don't know, it's just often silly things like, just put that thing away, or no, this is the way the jars face, because if the jars are facing a different way, then it just upsets my equilibrium, and I think that's the kind of autism side that needs, that and it's why I'm a dab hand at a spreadsheet, because I love the comfort in the numbers, I love the system, but I have 463 ideas every hour, And I think that's the ADHD and the autism kind of mixing, like to think it's a positive.
[14:01] Ian: Yeah, there's positives and negatives with all of these things, and that's what I try and do this podcast is like, neurodiversity can be a superpower, and there are elements of it, but there are some difficult things and I don't want to sugarcoat that.
[14:17] That's we're trying to get the mix.
[14:19] that was like, two or three years ago, when the ADHD and autism came into play and you got assessed and diagnosed. But when do you think ADHD and autism first became a part of your story? Looking back to maybe childhood and looking back then, what would you say?
[14:42] Libby: presumably, because it's not something you develop, right? It's something you're, born with. But certainly I was the, I'm the youngest, only of two, but I'm the youngest. And I wasn't as interested in the academic world as my parents and my brother, who was a straight A student for everything. And I could do it. But I'm just not interested, and I can see now that it's because the way things are taught are just boring, it's boring, I've never really enjoyed going to museums where there isn't, where there isn't some sort of level of, interactivity. Interactivity? Interaction. and there's there's kind of things like that.
[15:27] I, did fine at school, did absolutely fine at school. but, I didn't, some would say I didn't apply myself, but that's because I wasn't interested in, a lot of it. And the topics were, the subjects I chose weren't the right subjects, but I chose them because that was the expectation.
[15:45] So it, I can see that was a real problem there. And I think the biggest issue for me, the biggest kind of catalyst was when I left school, because whilst the subject I'd chosen, the way that they were taught weren't, didn't necessarily appeal to me, which I think is the ADHD side, the autistic side loved knowing where to sit, knowing where everyone was, knowing who I was going to eat my lunch with, all that kind of routine, and your friendship group, that was, there was a real safety, in that.
[16:20] And when I left school, I didn't have that anymore. And. Yeah, it was not good. Let's just say that it was not good at all. And I think that's where, my family would probably say that I went off the rails or something, but hardly, but I, got into a bit of bother and it was just because I was trying to work out how on earth life worked, it was, a really, and I talk, I've said, before that my, my twenties, My twenties were not a huge amount of fun, I don't think, because part of me, the autistic side probably, was trying to do the, trying to do the career, bought a house at 21, really, responsible stuff that I felt I was expected to do, family's expectations. But the ADHD side meant I changed jobs every six months, got into all sorts of trouble, did loads of clubbing, did a bit of drugs, but not really. Major stuff, just went a bit wild and yeah, it was horrible. it was, looking back, it was just a really, unhappy time.
[17:32] Which is not great for your early 20s,
[17:34] but yeah, don't have fond memories of that time. But I, the diagnosis has helped me understand why, which I think is,
[17:40] I'm grateful for.
[17:41] Ian: so why did you, why do you think you went wild? a lot of young people go wild, this is not, it's not unheard of for people to go clubbing and, but, it sounds as if you were seeking something through all of that, or you were using it. Do you think you were using it as a kind of almost self medicating almost, or was it something else?
[18:07] What was going on then?
[18:08] Yeah.
[18:10] Libby: I've never been a big drinker and, I said, taking drugs, blimey, I used to like sometimes take some speed if I went clubbing, it was hardly like problematic. However, it was so different from my family environment. That's I guess that's, we were quite all quite square as well in our friendship group at school.
[18:26] it was, I was. I was the, devil, if you like, I was the one who, did things and I was never afraid to take risks. and I think it was because I'd lived, my family's quite, possibly autistic traits through all of them, but they're quite, quiet and are quite structured and don't really let themselves go and don't talk about feelings and emotions and all that stuff. And I am an absolute mess of emotions all the time. So I think I was just trying to find an outlet for that because I had no guidance, right? I had nobody. I had nobody who'd ever done anything different. Everybody in my family, they'd, my parents were both teachers forever. My brother had gone to uni and then done a PhD and, done this really traditional path.
[19:17] And I just didn't want to do any of that. And I, that was seen as a failing, but I can see now. I just, it makes me really sad because if I look at younger Libby and it's Oh my God, why didn't someone just Why didn't someone just help her? Why didn't someone just sit down and support her? And, why wasn't there some kind of guiding person? I don't know if anybody has these. But just somebody, there was, I didn't feel that there was ever a, an older figure who, was there, to support me. Not that my parents didn't love me, but they just were so different, yeah, so it's sad. And I, it's all because of, it's all because of what goes on in my head, It's sad.
[19:59] Ian: But that's, that's lovely that you've got, it sounds like you've got a lot of compassion for that early Libby, you look back and, I think that's really important because I went through a time of looking at younger Ian and not quite despising him, but just thinking what a complete idiot.
[20:19] And, then I, then through the ADHD diagnosis, I started to have a lot more compassion because there was a reason why I struggled with certain things. going back to school for you and the fact that you didn't maybe apply yourself in the way that your parents wanted you to, and it's not like you were, you did, it sounds like you didn't do like really badly.
[20:43] Libby: Oh, no, not at all. Not at all by most people's
[20:45] Ian: No,
[20:46] Libby: I'm not, I didn't get straight A's, which was a failure in my family.
[20:50] Ian: So there was that, and then obviously, going off the rails in your 20s. So it sounds like you were, there was something about, you weren't you
[21:06] were worried about what your parents were thinking about you. what,
[21:11] was
[21:11] there an element of guilt with this? what was going through your mind when it came to your parents?
[21:18] And did that almost, feed into it more and make you more go off the rails or what was, happening?
[21:26] Libby: Yeah. this is not an issue that has gone away. I'll just say that. I'm in my late forties, and it's I was diagnosed at 46. 48, 47, 48. and, yeah, I've had a lot of therapy about my relationship with my parents. and expectations and the fact that, this is quite difficult for me to talk about and talk about so publicly.
[21:58] but it, Cause, cause on the surface, everything's fine, right? we had, we used to go to France for a month every summer and, we, we had everything that we wanted. it was, there was never any arguments, on the surface, it was a nice middle class upbringing, but it didn't fit me. And, my feeling Through my entire life, and it's only really, recently that I'm actually properly getting to the other side of this, is that I've just been a massive disappointment. I've just been a massive disappointment. which is awful, which is hard and I wouldn't wish that on anybody because it impacts everything. And I'm not a disappointment, I'm just very different To my family, I just, I have this crazy kind of impulsive fun side, which I love, you know I just had the tattoo of a roller coaster done on my arm and of course that brought about lots of, from my mother, and it's I'm nearly 50, who cares what you think?
[23:08] But inside, obviously I care massively because it has a huge impact, but it's allowing myself to really be me and to let go of the judgment that is part factual and part perceived, right? there's some truth to it, but also a lot of it's what I, it's my own sort of what I've made it be true. Yeah, so it's, a tough one. It's a tough one.
[23:35] And I, because we're not a family that talks about how we feel, that's why I come on podcasts.
[23:41] Ian: It's like
[23:42] Libby: I would never have, I would, yeah, I would never say this to my parents, never in a million years. And they're highly unlikely to listen to this, but, never said, but it's, Yeah, it's really hard to communicate because there's a lot of kind of polite conversation and it's just you're dying inside.
[24:02] So it's, really made, the whole thing makes me really, sad.
[24:05] Ian: No, I'm sorry to hear that. it's a tough one when it comes to relationships with people. people close, who are close in our lives. And so that, that's your parents. How about yourself though? Cause often it can be ourselves that we're very judgmental of ourselves. And we, can have, we can start to think, I'm a disaster.
[24:28] I'm no good. I'm a failure. How much has that been an issue for you? Or is it mainly your perceive is your perception of other people's view of you? What's your perception of yourself? And how has ADHD and autism affected that do you think?
[24:46] Libby: I think the biggest thing with me, because I've done some really cool stuff, because I'm not afraid to try things. I've had some amazing jobs and I've always worked and I've always had really good jobs. And so till I started my business in 2011. I've always done really well in the workplace, even if it hasn't quite suited me, but, And I've got all this, evidence for it, but the thing that I've never felt is satisfied or in the place that I should be.
[25:18] Do you know, it's always felt like I'm either trying to prove a point or I'm trying to get to the next step or, I'm doing it because it's the right thing to do. That, kind of stuff. And it really is only now. And, That's absolutely goes for the first few years of my business for sure. And it's only really in the last kind of two or three years, since I started exploring this other side that I've thought, hang on, what do I really want?
[25:40] And, oh yeah, I can just do that. And if I'm weird, then fine, whatever it's my own business. let it, let me be as, let me behave as weirdly as I like, and people will come or they won't come the same as if I was the most sensible person in the world, they would come or they wouldn't come. No, so it's, Yeah, it's a really, it's a really interesting journey, and I, have certainly been on a journey of self that I'm continuing to, go on.
[26:06] Yeah.
[26:06] Ian: I think we all were on that. So that's, that was your, teens and your twenties. and then when you hit your thirties, everything became fine and normal, didn't it? Not
[26:19] Libby: It was better.
[26:20] Ian: so what, happened? Cause obviously that 20, the twenties was like this emotional rollercoaster.
[26:25] You were all over the place. You say things got better in your thirties and then into your forties. Tell us a little bit more about what happened.
[26:33] Libby: so every decade has got better. I'm, gonna be turning 50 soon, which is, oh, that's a head scratcher in itself. But, yeah, my 50s is gonna be like the best decade, because it has got better each year, and part of that is because I'm just being way more me, I'm masking, but just recognising what it is that I really want from life. But when I was, 24, I met Someone, and he was very I don't know. He was very good for me in that he was very sensible and kind and all of this. And, yeah, we got married when I was 28 and moved to a house. I was 27, I think in, a new development, and everybody, so everybody was new and there were lots of couples the same age, and I loved living there.
[27:22] I had a real comfort space living there. And I, ended up living there for 15 years in that house and I was really, I was really happy then and work was much better. And I had a, comfortable friendship group. And I won't say that there weren't the. crazy things happening, but I definitely felt a lot more settled.
[27:42] until I started my own business and I realized that I didn't want to be married to that person anymore because I was moving on to bigger things, baby. And, yeah, so that was like 39? Yes. Yes, I was 39. when we got divorced and so that led to three years of total derailment. Still had my business, but I made all my staff you were there when I made the decision in America to make all my staff redundant and give up
[28:16] the office and everything. Yeah, that was a big thing and part of that was my journey of self discovery. That was 2015. And, the three years between husbands, I like to call it, was really difficult for me.
[28:31] And I did, I met a girl who'd just split up with her husband. So we became absolutely inseparable and I was out a lot and I drank more than I've ever drunk in my life because I've not been a big drinker and I would quite often not remember getting home and, scrape knees. and have inappropriate or ill advised relationships with people.
[28:53] And it was not great. It was not great. And during that time as well, I sold the house because I bought my ex out. I sold my house, because it was a lot to pay for on my own. bought a much smaller house and then got together with my now husband, my current husband, and everything settled down.
[29:12] Everything settled down again. So it's been Whilst my 40s, there's been so much amazing stuff that's happened in my 40s, but I can see how that period of time was just like, whoa, I am lost and I'm doing what I did in my early 20s, except perhaps with more fun involved, but the, kind of almost self destruction, but to try and find, to find my place again
[29:36] in life and the world.
[29:37] Yeah.
[29:38] Ian: Yeah, that makes sense. That makes sense. And this is one of the things with ADHD, particularly the emotional, I suppose it's called emotional dysregulation where most people with ADHD are very emotional people. And it's like, what do you do with all that emotion? It's got to, it's got to go somewhere.
[29:57] being, being diagnosed and knowing you have ADHD really gives you a, I think of vocabulary, we can understand what's happening. How has, Knowing that you have ADHD and autism, how's that changed the way view your challenges and your strengths? Because as you said right at the beginning, there are good things and difficult things.
[30:25] Libby: it's the good things. I think I've always known that I'm good at them. So it's, you just still accept that it's, I'm really good at speaking on stage and I'm really good at motivating people, all this stuff. And I When you're good at something, then you don't analyze it as much, right? but the other stuff that like, if I'm going on a train somewhere and I, because I've got to be somewhere at a certain time and I get to the train station, the train's really delayed or the train is canceled. I can absolutely lose it. I can have a proper meltdown because of that, because I can't cope with it. And that's, I've always been like that. And, you put down, you put it down as overdramatic but now I know. It's because of the way I'm wired and so it's really helped in my relationship I don't know if you found that since your diagnosis in the process that you guys have been through But certainly I can phone my husband in like absolute floods of tears I don't speak English And he can just know that it's part of the thing and I just need to get it out and then I'll be fine and it'll be gone and it'll be fine. But it's, yeah, so I think that's been really important to know that I'm not weak, I'm not a drama queen, I'm not attention seeking, it's just the way I am, And it's fine, it's just a quirk, right?
[31:53] Ian: Yeah, it's the way, it's the way your brain is wired and understanding like, if you are phoning your husband in floods of tears, like it's, there is a reason why it's not. and actually it, you are not alone in that, that, it's just, we don't tend to see those kind of private moments. and that's interesting, because in the past, you'd probably, I'm assuming you tell me, try to hold yourself together.
[32:22] there was a lot more of the masking that went, came into place. And I'm interested, I've looked at my own life and seen the moments that I've masked symptoms, particularly with ADHD, but I'm interested for you, how has that manifested itself? with ADHD and also autism, and how
[32:44] less
[32:44] likely are you to mask these days?
[32:47] Is, that, are you finding that a liberating experience, masking less? Or are you still doing that to an extent?
[32:53] Libby: I think that we all do it to a certain extent, but I don't mind a little jig in the supermarket if the mood comes over me. I'm not, I'm not, bothered about that. And the, the, the, stimming, I, don't mind. I do, I, some of it I've always done, but now we, we, we were aware, we, me and my husband, we're aware, he's always pointed stuff out to me way before my diagnosis.
[33:23] He's like, why do you hold your thumbs like this, and what are you doing with your fingers? And that was more or less when we first got together and of course now we know why. so it's just seen as Libbyism, but the, yeah, I think even the fact, talking about this. This stuff has been very helpful to me and it's also brought clients to me because I am open and honest and it's I'm not, I can't change it.
[33:49] So let me just, let me talk about it to me. It's just, it's it's another thing like, I'm neurodivergent. I'm a woman, these are all things, these are all kind of identifiers that, that we, talk about and we, share. So I don't look at it as a disability, which technically it technically is, but I'm really uncomfortable with that. But the time when I'm asked the most, and this will be of no surprise to you is when I go and see my parents or my family, because then I have to revert back to, the sort of well behaved. Teenager, I don't know. Yeah, I just, I don't behave as, I, would. Yeah.
[34:32] Or as I would really want to.
[34:33] Ian: it's a tough one, isn't it? but, thinking about those Libby, Libbyisms or whatever you call them, it's those bits about you that, it's not going to be for everyone. There's, going to be some people That will be put off by some of the things that you do. That's I think we get need to get to a point where that's okay.
[34:52] Like we can't be, we can't be for everybody, but some people are going to love that. Some people are going to love your little quirks and that's going to, and we're talking about whether that's, friends or in business and people when you're on camera and you're doing some Libyanisms, that's.
[35:13] Something that I don't think we should be trying to hide and I've,
[35:18] I'm
[35:18] sure I have some of those too and I, think I've tried to mask those and we're all trying to become some kind of normal, whatever that is. And it's that normal that is boring and particularly as we get into this more and more into this world of AI and where everything becomes potentially artificial. I think we need this even more than ever. I think we need to embrace our weirdness, our inner weirdness. So I'm all for that. But do you think, not talking particularly about your parents here, but
[35:53] do
[35:53] you think there are moments when we do have to mask the certain situations that call for something, or do you think there are other strategies that you've implemented to help you get through a situation?
[36:08] Because, arguably masking is, not a great solution to that. I don't know.
[36:14] Libby: I think there are, it's really difficult because the last thing I want to do is sound ableist and squash me and the way we are and the way I am and squash you and the way you are. However, for those of us, and I still don't, I'm still not really up on all the kind of terminology, but those of us that I believe are called high functioning, Neurodivergent people is, we know that when we're, oh I don't know, in a meeting with the bank manager, there's a certain, there's certain language that you choose to use and you sit, and you might, twitch, for sure, you might twitch your knees and all of this, it's not but it's, you don't get up and dance in the middle of that meeting. Yeah. maybe we should, right? Maybe that's something wrong there. But it's, that, that is a level of masking. But I think that's a conscious behaviour choice. I, it's really uncomfortable talking about this because like I say, it just sounds horribly ableist and I don't, I obviously, I don't mean it like that because I'm including, I'm talking about myself too.
[37:26] Ian: Yeah.
[37:26] Libby: But, yes, we, there are, but things like, in the supermarket and if there's a song playing and I'm like, I, that, to me is unmasked. And I don't know, that doesn't, to me, there's nothing wrong with that. But I know some people will say, that's not how you behave in the supermarket. And I'm like, as long as I pay for my groceries, I don't see why it matters. So it's, about having, it's about having the balance. And I think saying to people, I am. Autistic Eye, I'm ADHD. if it's going to make you feel more comfortable and enable you to not mask as much, then that's really important to do. if, there's concessions that you need, then ask for them. Because this is, not, there's no stigma attached to that, or
[38:13] increasingly less stigma, And so we have to almost take control of it ourselves and lead by example, because society is a bit slow to catch up sometimes.
[38:24] Ian: It is. And it's, it is an uncomfortable conversation in a way, but I think it's a really important conversation. We, in many ways we've come so far, we're able to talk about neurodiversity, ADHD, autism, all these things, a lot more, but we live in the real world where not everyone gets it. And there are still misconceptions and stigmas.
[38:47] People don't understand it. We're going to be judged. if I just let it all out, I may not get The job that I want, I may lose clients over it and we can say, okay, that's tough luck. It's their, problem, not mine, but we live in a real world where we've got mortgages to pay and it's a tough one.
[39:14] Ultimately, I think, we do have to think about our mental health and we have to think about all of that, but it's a balance, isn't it? And so I wanted to ask you about misconceptions and stigmas. You, yourself, had them. I had them. I remember talking about, oh, these people with ADHD, they're just lazy and all that kind of, I had all the, it's really bad.
[39:38] But I think so many of us. Back in those days, I'm talking about probably in the 90s and the early 2000s, we just didn't know very much. things have changed now, but do you still think, are you still faced with misconceptions from other people or even yourself or stigmas about ADHD and autism? And, how have you addressed those?
[40:02] Libby: It was really interesting when I got diagnosed because I decided, so it's almost exactly, I don't know when this goes out, but it was, it's almost exactly a year since I was diagnosed with autism. And, I, made the decision almost straight away, probably too much to fully embrace it, to talk about it and to tell people about it.
[40:24] And I was in a bit of a vulnerable state at the time because it was a lot to take on. I told people probably too quickly, but a few people have said, you don't look autistic. And it's like, all right, okay, that old chestnut. And also, you can't be because all autists, this guy I've known for years and years, and he said, I would never have guessed because autistic people talk like Daleks.
[40:50] And I'm like, what?
[40:52] Ian: Oh,
[40:53] Libby: I was like, what? I don't, that's not what I've ever heard before. But, and it was so strange and it was so unvalidating, whatever the opposite of validating is. because it was like, This is, how I am. You wouldn't say that if I, and I'm not comparing the two, but you wouldn't say that if I said I'd just been diagnosed with cancer, right?
[41:16] You don't look like
[41:16] you've got cancer and I'm not saying they are the same thing. It's just the first thing that popped into my head. And sometimes those of us with ADHD, we say the first thing that comes into our minds and it's not always the most appropriate, but you understand, you
[41:28] Ian: Yeah, of course, yeah.
[41:29] Libby: So it's just why, what, how am I supposed to look? What am I supposed to be doing? and that was, really difficult. So that stigma still exists. But actually, for me now, a year on, almost exactly a year on from that diagnosis, I absolutely own this. And there isn't a talk that I'll do now where I won't mention it, at least in passing.
[41:52] So a couple of weeks ago, I spoke on stage to nearly 300 people and it's it was part of that. And actually a few people came and spoke to me afterwards and said, yeah, that really resonated. And I just know that it hits, strikes a chord for people. So I am what I am, right? And sure, I wish I was a bit thinner and, actually finished things sometimes and, made a million pounds while I was asleep and, all these things that we wish for, but ultimately, I'm me, I'm quite accepting of myself, I don't dislike myself, I'm quite happy with myself, I've got a really loving, happy relationship and, that, I'm alright, Jack, kind of thing,
[42:38] Ian: That's awesome. No, that's really, it's really awesome. And
[42:42] if
[42:42] I may say this, since we've known each other for such a long time, you are so much, you seem to me so much more happy in yourself than when I first met you and you're just happy to be who you are. And that is That's the most wonderful thing.
[43:01] and if we let other people's views of us, cloud that it's such a difficult thing. it's not going to help us. And it's interesting. So when, I, so when, you came out as ADHD, I just came
[43:18] Libby: came out, Told everyone my dirty secret.
[43:23] Ian: that, that kind of made sense to me. And then the autism thing, I'll be honest, like I thought, oh, I get, I, and I thought I'll, I'm gonna come out with it. That's not what I would've thought. and the reason for that is,
[43:40] I
[43:40] dunno, anything about autism. and that my, my view, and it wasn't just you, there was a few other people I know who, have found out they're autistic and I thought.
[43:50] Libby: We're everywhere now, It
[43:54] Ian: interesting and we need, I've done a lot of research into ADHD and I understand not everything about it, but a lot about it. And that kind of struck me. I thought, okay, Libby's a good friend of mine and she said she's autistic and that's come as a bit of a surprise to me.
[44:10] What am I going to do about that? And so it's something that I really want to learn much more about. And, because I think so often people will, and maybe that again, maybe it's an ADHD thing. They just come out with it. Oh, you're not autistic,
[44:27] know,
[44:28] and so like, how do you, think it's really up to other people to do the stuff or have you when people say to you, Oh, I didn't think you were autistic, is the, Do you have some kind of response to that?
[44:42] Or do you just say, come on, get, with it, educate yourself.
[44:45] Libby: hasn't happened for a while actually. It hasn't, it was a very kind of early on thing with, people I'd known for a long time. And I suppose you move and reshape your community, right? And being in the entrepreneurial community and most of the people I talk to are business owners and all that. Everybody's yeah, me too. whether they're diagnosed or not. It certainly identifies, particularly with ADHD. So it's, almost we're in the gang together. but it's, I Yeah, I've forgotten the question, sorry.
[45:23] Ian: It's all right. No, it was just like,
[45:25] Libby: There's a pure example, it's like my thought process has gone
[45:28] another way and I'm like, that's not what he said.
[45:30] Ian: it was partly my problem because I probably asked about five questions at the same time. So I will rephrase it. It's,
[45:38] I
[45:38] suppose it's like when people say to you, When you say to people, I have ADHD and autism, and people come back with a slightly, oh, kind of response.
[45:51] Oh, doesn't everyone have that? Or, the, those kinds of things, or they come out with those kinds of comments that would have probably really frustrated you in the past. What, is your response these days?
[46:06] Libby: so we're all a bit ADHD, is a really common one, isn't it? And it's Yeah, we might be because you're all undiagnosed and actually neuro, neurodivergent is way more common than neurotypical. So then named the wrong things. so that I have that belief, I think actually, but it's, that's, they're talking about the good stuff, right?
[46:30] They're talking about the kind of. just not putting things away properly and not finishing stuff and being late and all of that, which are traits, but it's the other stuff. And it's no, you don't actually live in my head, which last night, for example, was so noisy that I didn't go to sleep until nearly half two, which is insane. And my husband's alarm went off at five 55. So that was a fun night. and it's that constant brain noise that i think is the most debilitating for me. Sure there's the crying because your train gets cancelled and you know all the kind of seemingly silly stuff or the Fear of going outside because you don't know where there's going to be someone else on the street and kind of stuff like that.
[47:17] but it's constant and it's, you've got a song playing in your head as well as a conversation from four years ago and all you've just thought of your cracking line to, to give back to them as well as planning what you're going to do with your business, as well as thinking, Oh, I haven't replied to those emails as well as the, just the kind of audible noise of everything. And that is. Absolutely exhausting. And nobody can see that. you sit in there quietly. I do a lot of this. I sit there quietly. Maybe even with my eyes closed. But I am busier than most neurotypical people will ever be in their entire life. Because it's all in, it's all internal. And that's really tough.
[47:59] And that's hard to deal with. communicate to people, but then if people are not interested, really interested, I'm not gonna waste my time bothering to try and explain any of it, Because it's I don't want to know about them, they don't want to know about me. Fine.
[48:14] Ian: yeah, no, make, sense. So it, but it is, it, is something that has, when people have come out with those kind of things, it, I feel under pressure to have to then try and explain things. And, I've come to the point now thinking, why do I, why am I spending all that time doing that is just not particularly helpful.
[48:34] But one way to do that is through this podcast and to have these kinds of conversations. So this has been great. I want to ask you about coming back to business, is how has ADHD and autism influenced your creativity? Process or your approach to entrepreneurship. you've had what I lovingly call, proper jobs and you've had, you've worked for yourself as well.
[49:02] I jokingly say that, but how, has that. Yeah. Tell us a bit about that, please.
[49:08] Libby: It's been a blessing and a curse, but now I understand it. which, I'm grateful for. in my business, you've been in business for 13 years this year, and whilst I've always focused Really on the same thing, which is helping business owners to be more efficient and to make more money that's been in 450 different guises by, there was social media training and then there was social media management and then there's strategic consultancy and then there's, done for you, add stuff and then. And then there's in person days and then there's online days. And then, Oh, I'll run a BTEC qualification. that was like, I don't even do business about six months when I started doing that. and then, and it's just it's really hard to explain my business journey because it's I've done what I've done all of those
[50:00] things and the ability to pivot. Is incredible, right? I think that is a gift that we have that tomorrow you and I could both, we could set up a business together and make it immediately successful, right? Because we've got the brain capacity and that, that push of energy to be able to do it, we probably would have run out of steam by Saturday though, because it's too, because the joys in the creating and you, don't necessarily have that, the mental energy that it takes to sustain, sustain stuff.
[50:33] Whilst it's brilliant because I have all these ideas for my own business, it's a curse because I launch things and unlaunch things and I'm far better now. I have recognized this and put parameters in place to stop me doing that and take a much slower journey in my pivots. But it makes me an absolutely fantastic business coach.
[50:54] And I say that without, without any kind of, massive ego about it because I know it's true because there is so much in my head that, and I've worked with six and a half thousand business owners since I started, that there's hardly an issue, an emotion, a mindset challenge, a problem, conundrum, that they can't bring to me, that I can't solve for them or reframe for them because of all the experience I've got and because of everything I collect along the way, you, the, your, our brains are just like, not, they're, Bigger than sponges, whatever bigger than the sponges.
[51:28] It's there's so AIs, right? Because there's so much information in there. And you don't even know that conversation you overheard 10 years ago is going to be needed today. But there it is. It comes out. And I think that, that I absolutely love that about my brain. I love its ability to be able to do that.
[51:49] And I almost, I talk about it in in the third person almost, but but yeah, the, inability to stick at stuff, the shiny object, the wanting to do something different is the hard balance of that,
[52:04] Ian: of course. So what are the strategies that you strategies and tools that you've learned in managing your ADHD and autism symptoms. Now, not all of these necessarily have to be good. Sometimes we learn bad, bad strategies, which kind of come back to bite us. So I don't know whether you've inadvertently learned those over the years.
[52:26] And, you mentioned the whole kind of high functioning thing. I think this is a particular issue. With those of us in that category, whatever the word is in the phrase, and I, can't work out the right phrases for that. But those of us who have had success in our businesses, we've probably learned certain strategies that are bad and good.
[52:46] Have you got any thoughts on that?
[52:47] Libby: Yeah, I think one thing that, excuse me, one thing that I've learned over the years, and actually, really, if I'm being absolutely honest, I've probably only really implemented it in the last year or so. So I talk like I'm seasoned at this, but no, I struggle with this stuff every day. there's, I'm exceptional at helping other people, but, this is chaos, right?
[53:07] My desk is chaos. it's not too bad, but, it's What you say and what comes out is not necessarily what you're able to do yourself. A couple of shoes and all that, but one, one strategy that I, implement, and I talk, I've talked about this in my own podcast and I talk about this with my clients, is about sitting on, things. So having the ideas is incredible, right? And that fires us up and that gives us enthusiasm for life as much as business. And we can plan them out and we can write it down. And then we can just leave it for 48 hours. And if we still have any enthusiasm, if we even still remember what was so brilliant about it, if that kind of fire is still there, then act on it. But what I always used to do was have these amazing ideas, create the website, create the, create the funnel, launch the thing, get people to sign up. And the next day go. Oh no, I don't want to do that anymore. And I can think of two, two examples of when I've launched and then unlaunched. And it's a horrible rollercoaster to be on that.
[54:17] It's a really tough rollercoaster to be on. So sitting on stuff and not doing anything with the idea for 48 hours is a brilliant tactic. and in terms of bad, Not bad things, but things don't, that, you might beat yourself up for not doing is like batching content. And I've talked about batching content a lot.
[54:39] I've talked about, I've talked about it. I taught social media for years, right? Batching content is always a thing. Batching content is really hard because you've got to be in the right frame of mind to write the content in the first place. it's not necessarily, and if you're not doing it, or you do it for a bit and then you don't do it, it's like you're beating yourself up, but actually you're not giving yourself the kindness of understanding how it is that you, your, brain works.
[55:03] So just do what you need to do, As long as you've got a plan, then things like that are perhaps too literal. I think that's the thing, because there is absolutely a place for batching content, even if it's just like collating your images and, this kind of stuff. But there's, ways that you can interpret it.
[55:21] But if we take everything literally, it's a bit difficult. It can be a bit difficult.
[55:26] Ian: No, that makes sense. So, since you were diagnosed, and, you,
[55:34] understand a lot more about yourself, what has, what's been the next, what was the next stage, in terms of, It was the understanding. Have you implemented any new things in your life? Whether that's been your personal life or your business life, what things have you put into place that have helped you?
[55:51] Libby: Well, first of all I went into burnout, I think. Took some time off a couple of months later. We met up, I think, last year. July or August when I was taking, I needed to take some time off because it was just all a lot to process and I was still trying to charge at a hundred miles an hour and I just realized that I couldn't do that anymore. So I'm much more mindful of my energy levels and I've talked about this for years. However, now I am genuinely much more mindful of my energy levels. And so my business has continued to shape itself after the, over the last year or so. into something that really suits me. And, we often in business, we talk a lot about our clients and how we're going to serve our clients and the transformation we get for our clients and what our client needs.
[56:42] And it's yeah, but hang on a minute, it's your business. What do you need first and foremost? What do what's your, What do you call it? Oxygen mask. where's yours? And the business has to suit you. So the changes that I'm, implementing now is as few Zoom calls in my diary as possible because they're really tiring.
[57:02] I know they're easy to do, but they're really draining and they're really tiring. And only going to the events that I know are going to be good, or there's interesting people there, making a conscious decision. Decision about the events I go to, not just going to everything and not giving into FOMO just because everyone else is going.
[57:19] you've got an event the day afterwards, you don't have to do it all. So making those, changes and phasing out some of the type of work that I've done for a long time, which is one to one. I've always done it. And I love it in the moment because it gives that dopamine hit and I can make a big difference to the clients. But. It's tiring. it's really, tiring and I have to, and I'm not getting any younger. So I have to be really mindful of that and, moving back into a group coaching kind of model because it has to be, it has to be sustainable for me. And I don't want to have to keep pivoting my business because something's not sitting right in my business because I'm tired of doing that.
[58:03] Ian: Yeah, I get that. for me, I've done things like I've, I've had like assistance in my business for years, but I've then realized how much I need that in my life. and I've been looking at more holistic ways of, Treating my ADHD. Personally, at the moment, I haven't gone down the medication route, but I might do in the future. I have, I think you said you mentioned therapy as well. That's, helped and I've had coaching. There's been anything like that's made a big impact and I really helped you, with your ADHD and autism. So do
[58:41] Libby: two things, immediately spring to mind. One is EFT, tapping, emotional freedom technique. I've been having that on and off for probably about three years. and it really helps me deal with, I have it monthly at the moment. I'm in a kind of six, six month program of having it one to one. And it really helps me to just, I don't know, quiet my mind a bit. And the stuff that niggles, and the RSD when That crops up and the stuff that I do beat myself up for it helps me rationalize that and also it helps me reframe all the stuff that I'm carrying through from my childhood and the disappointment thing and all that stuff and be more, what's the word, measured about it and, true, truthful about it rather than what I think is actually going on. So that's always been you
[59:40] Ian: mentioned RSD, that's rejection sensitivity dysphoria, is that the right? Yeah, maybe explain that and also a little bit more about, it's really interesting because we talked about EFT last time and we were talking about, that's quite a woo thing and I always have a woo detector, but I've heard quite a few people talk about this and it's one of those things that it might sound a bit woo, but I've heard it really does work and maybe explain a little bit more about what it is and why it works for you.
[0:12] Hahaha.
[0:15] Libby: Because I'm not a woo person at all, right? So some of this stuff I'm like, okay, I just have to, I just have to not understand it. And that's fine. and, but the practitioner that I use, she's Canadian. So I've never met her, but she's one of my dearest friends. We met on Instagram three years ago.
[0:30] Three or so years ago. And, yeah, fantastic. And she, she calls herself Wu adjacent, which I quite like because she's very, practical and very scientific in her approach. But obviously there's this kind of you just take a while with it too. And I think, I don't know if it's the tapping itself, because you tap in certain places on your, face, and say, stuff or repeat stuff while you're tapping. I don't know if it's that helps or just being in the space where someone is reframing something for me. So I don't actually know which bits, bits work, but I know that working with Jackie Akree, who, I work with, I know that she is good for me, right? So I, it's difficult to, quantify it, it more than that, but it's that looking at things differently. That is really, helpful and we do a lot of visualisation and I have the world's most vivid imagination, probably because I'm autistic, and so I find that really helpful to just reframe scenarios that I can think of in the past that I'm still carrying with me that, just are rubbish and I don't need that stuff in my life. and the RSD, the Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, oh, that's not fun. that just is not fun. I don't know if you, if it impacts you.
[1:56] Ian: Yeah. Yeah.
[1:57] Libby: It's horrible, right? So it, the feeling of being a total failure and everybody hating you, right? Everybody in the whole world will feel that at some point, but this is You really believe that is, is true. And you're a waste of space. You're a waste of time. nobody cares whether you're here or not, it can be really quite extreme feelings, but not necessarily for long. this can be a few hours in the afternoon or you wake up feeling like that. And by lunchtime, because you've sat at your desk and you've done something, you feel all right again. it doesn't, stick around for long with me, but when it happens, it's, Yeah, it's horrible. It's, the worst, it's the worst thing because it frightens me, It really, frightens me feeling like that because I know it not to be true, but oh my goodness me I believe it in the moment.
[2:53] Ian: it's that it's because we're very emotional people that we it and that is a deep emotion. And so it's very difficult not to believe it, even though you your brain saying that's not true. I'm not a complete disaster. I have had some successes in my life, but I feel like a complete fraud and an idiot.
[3:14] it's, it's, not a nice, it's not a nice feeling. but it's cool that you've found ways and strategies that help. And so if you're watching and listening and you're a little bit dubious about some of these things, it might be that EFT isn't for you. That's fine. There'll be other things, but it's finding strategies that are going to work for you.
[3:36] And that's what you've done.
[3:37] Libby: there's something else that I had very recently that it's worth to me just talking about because I didn't know what it was. So I met someone at an event and she talked to her about, she's a, I don't really know what kind of therapist, but like a sort of woo therapist, but she's very practical in the way she talks.
[3:54] And she told her story and said she'd, how she helped people and all that. I just thought, Oh, I think that's what I need next. about being more open, being more heart based and less head based. And I thought that, I think that could be an interesting shift for me. So I had a session and she did something where I was just lying on the bed and it was lovely and comfy and all of this and she just had her hands on my head in various spots like this and afterwards, as I was walking back to the train station, my brain was quiet and it was the weirdest, feeling because my brain is never quiet, not even when I'm asleep because my dreams are so vivid. And it was just, and that, that therapy, it was called Access Bars, and I'd never heard of it, and I'd never experienced it, and I went, not even, still not knowing what it was called, but it was absolutely, incredible. And it, is used by, psychologists, psychiatrists, but it's used, it's not as it's used by medical people too, so that was quite comforting because, Anything that's,
[5:01] Ian: You weren't going
[5:02] Libby: forest bathing or something makes me feel a bit weird, but yeah, it's got a, it's got a kind of scientific side to it too, but that was like, that was, I was like, whoa, this is, must be, what it's like for other people.
[5:12] Just quiet.
[5:13] Ian: yeah, that must be weird. I don't think I've had that before. but it is. It's interesting. There's a book, which I only partly read. This is again, an ADHD problem because I would love to have so many books I would love to read and I start them. But, book by, is it Ned Hallowell?
[5:33] he was author of, It's really, co author of this really good book called, driven to distraction, which is like the Bible of the ADHD world. And the book that he wrote is called ADHD 2. 0, and it's all about more holistic approaches, ways of helping ADHD. And some, of the things that I've talked about are balancing, like practicing your balancing. this is why things like Pilates is really good because apparently you're working on your cerebellum, which is the.
[6:03] The back of the brain. I, believe, which is I'm gonna sound like a, I know what I'm talking about, which I don't really, but apparently that is connected to the prefrontal cortex, which is the, which is what so many of us with A DHD struggle with, that the prefrontal cortex is not as, has developed.
[6:23] And so apparently that can really help, activate the prefrontal cortex a little bit more. I, there's some science, with all of this stuff, it's really interesting and it's a. it's a.
[6:35] Having ADHD and autism and all that kind of stuff, there are pros, there are cons, there are strengths, there are weaknesses or however you want to frame it.
[6:42] But it is a good time to be alive in terms of there's a lot more research, a lot more, we're learning about this and more better strategies. I think, if you went back to the 1800s or the 1900s, arguably the world that we were living in might have been a little bit kinder to those of us with ADHD, but there certainly wouldn't have been the knowledge about it.
[7:08] And so that wouldn't have been good. I think Libby, that's been, it's been amazing hearing your story. I'm sure we could have gone into more detail, but I think, I think, we'll leave it there. This has been really, interesting and a real privilege. So thank you so much for being so honest and open.
[7:29] Is there anything that, anything finally that you'd like to share with people who, have listened to your story and it's made an impact on them? What What's your, hope for people who are listening? How would you encourage them in their journey? Maybe they've struggled with some of the things that you've struggled with.
[7:48] What's your kind of final thoughts on that?
[7:51] Libby: I think just, to, reach out and say, do you know what, this sounds like me that I get messaged every time I do one of my own podcasts or talk about it, I get messages from people and it really, it's really, I find it really heartwarming that people, do that. And me just talking about myself and my life has had an impact on people and made them realize that actually they're not going mad.
[8:21] they're not a disappointment. There's just something different about their brain and that's okay. It really, I find it really empowering to empower other people. And I, Assume you're exactly the same. The reason why you started this podcast. And yeah, I would encourage people to message me, to message you, to actually just put the words to, to phone, to paper and come out, as you said earlier, that you think you might be, because that's, the start of the journey.
[8:51] And then you can join some Facebook groups and then you can connect with other people. And you'll soon find. That you're absolutely not alone because we're everywhere and it makes, life just so much easier. if one person has listened to this and has thought, wow, yeah, that's me, then that's brilliant.
[9:14] I'd be absolutely delighted with that. obviously I hope that loads of people listen to it, But I mean about
[9:19] impact.
[9:20] Ian: Yeah.
[9:21] Yeah. it's a new podcast. So we're starting small, but the aim is to, reach more and more people. So if you have been touched by this episode and what Libby's saying and Libby's story, please do get in touch. you can. Post comments, of course, if you're watching on YouTube or get in touch via my email, which is ian at smart ADHD dot me.
[9:43] And of course, we'll cross all the socials as well. If you would like to get in touch with Libby, what Libby, what's the best? How's the best way of people getting in touch with you?
[9:54] Libby: Instagram is probably the best way. So I'm at Libby Langley on Instagram. if LinkedIn is your preference, I'm Libby Langley on there. and if you want to hear more of me talking about my business story and kind of business support for people with neurodiversity, then my podcast is called Life in Business, and it comes out every, week.
[10:14] And I know that it does help people who are just like us.
[10:17] Ian: Yeah. And, it's great hearing you talk about your podcast because you clearly. Love it. You're passionate about it. And I know from what you've said that people really do find it so helpful. So do check out Libby's podcast and follow her on the socials and do reach out because it does it, we're wanting to make an impact on you watching and listening, but it means so much to us.
[10:45] I know I don't want to speak for you, Libby, but I should see me or the same that When we actually hear from you, you watching and listening, if it has made an impact, do let us know. Cause it makes it, it makes our day. It really does. Awesome. thanks Libby. It's been great. Great to have you on. I really appreciate it.
[11:07] but we are out of time for this week. I will be back with another episode. next week we were doing, just a combination of different things. It's either me speaking. on a topic, have an expert on or another, person with another smart ADHD are telling their smart ADHD story, but until next time, toodaloo.
[11:28]