Janet Murray’s Smart ADHD Story

[0:26] Ian: Hello, and welcome to another smarter the HD stories episode. This time I'm joined by my good friend Janet Murray, who is a business strategist, entrepreneur and creator of the courageous business planner bundle. She's also the host of the courageous podcast and the founder of the singing striders acquired that performs at major running events including the London Marathon.

[0:47] And And great Manchester run, and we'll talk a little bit more about that in the episode. But that's not all. Janet's latest venture, Pet Icons, involves creating hilarious portraits of pets dressed as famous icons. She's been podcasting for over a decade, published more than a thousand episodes, and is a keynote speaker who's graced global stages, including Inbound and Youpreneur Summit.

[1:09] When she's not working, Janet plays the piano, sings, runs, and chats with her three cats, though not all at once. She's also a mom, a qualified English athletics run leader, and the event director of her local park run. This is another Smart ADHD Stories episode where we dive into the raw, unedited life stories of fellow ADHDers who are successful business owners, creators, or entrepreneurs.

[1:36] And just to let you know, Janet was recovering from a pretty horrible cold, Possibly the C word, but, she was very gracious to join us anyway. So do bear that in mind as she kind of coughs her way through this episode, but let's get on with it right now.

[1:51] Hello, Janet, welcome to Smart ADHD. How are you doing

[1:55] Janet: I'm not my best, I have to say, but, I've, rallied, to do this interview, but yeah, I've, been unwell. I think I've had COVID again, I swear to God, I must have the record for how many times I've got it, and I think I've had it or some, something like it three times in the last six months, so if I sound a little bit hoarse and croaky, then, yeah, that's why.

[2:20] Ian: that is why and we've just started the podcast and you've mentioned the C word. So that's a great start. But that's what this, is a story episode. And these, episodes are all about. Raw and Authentic, I don't edit them, they're just an opportunity for, for you to share your story, with ADHD, and in your case, it's autism as well.

[2:46] I've introduced you already, but I'd love to hear, you probably hate this kind of thing, it's I, when my, when people who I don't know ask me, so what is it you do? What do you actually do, Ian? And I think, what, are you actually that interested in me? And, second of all, which Aspects of me are you wanting to know about but if you could like I don't know.

[3:07] for our listeners and viewers, what, how, would you describe yourself and what you do today?

[3:12] Janet: It's always a tough one. When people ask me out in the real world, I never really know quite what to say. it used to be easy because a journalist and then before that I was a teacher and they were very easy. But, I run my own business. I've had various iterations of that, which we can talk about.

[3:28] very ADHD. But, I now call myself a business strategist, and a copywriter. And actually, if you were to ask me what I was at the heart, I would say probably I was a writer and I, run a business, I guess I'm also an entrepreneur, that's had various iterations starting with helping people with getting press coverage like 10 years ago.

[3:53] I've had a business for 25 years or more, I think now. so starting off like that. Helping people to understand how to get press coverage. Then it was more marketing and content strategy and Moved now. I'm calling myself a business strategist and a strategic copywriter and maybe we can get into why I've had more kind of

[4:14] than Madonna and why I haven't just stuck with the same thing but yeah, but I mean at the heart of it if I think about the core skill for me that underpinned everything I've ever done, is writing and communicating and speaking.

[4:32] and I guess, yeah, so at the moment I'm, the business strategist. I've got a business plan. It used to be so much easier than it is now. You caught me at a good time, quite an ADHD time where I'm going through like a real period of of transition and change. I would have found this really easy a couple of years ago, just to go, yeah, I'll do this and I'll do that.

[4:54] but, I'm sure we'll get into that. But, yeah, business strategist, copywriter,

[4:57] Ian: Yeah.

[4:59] Janet: creative person. I run a choir. We can get into that as well. The Singing Striders, which I started on a whim. so yeah, that's probably not the best introduction I've ever given, but there you go.

[5:10] Ian: I identify with a lot of what you've just been saying there. It's, when we're, we reinvent ourselves a lot. would you say that you're, a lot of what you're, you've talked about that is that you are a creative person. So There's that creative aspects of you, but also this, that you want to help people, you're here in your business because you actually want to help people as well.

[5:36] how much of those things is important in what you do?

[5:38] Janet: Yeah, I think I love helping people, but actually I've just recorded a new training that, to go alongside my, strategic business planner, which I bring out every year. And at the start of it I said, what I think being a business owner or an entrepreneur is really about is about making opportunities.

[5:58] Like most business owners, yes, we like making money, but it's not what we do. Motivates us even if you think about like really, really super successful entrepreneurs they, sell a business and then they could go and lie on the beach and then they're just going to start another, don't they?

[6:13] But I think what motivates me is creating opportunities like and making things happen and solving problems and and, making things better and yeah, I do love helping people but I'm not like one of these people that's oh, I'll get up in the morning, my raison d'etre is to make people's lives better.

[6:37] but I think it is that problem solving, creating opportunities, finding the back door or the side entrance or, finding new ways to do things, better ways of doing things. I think, that's probably it.

[7:01] Ian: very much an ADHD thing. And it's interesting what you said about the making money thing. So I was just thinking about this the other day that there's this kind of almost, there's like a dichotomy here with money and making money as a business owner, because for me, that's never the driver.

[7:16] Like making money in of itself is not the driver I'm more interested in the creative aspect the problem solving the helping people. I want to be this Catalyst for the transformation in people's lives However, i'm also aware that if I don't make money then I can't actually do those things effectively and I can almost well, I will end up resenting what I do because ultimately I don't just want to help Just the people out there.

[7:46] I do want to do that, but I also want to support my family I want to help them as well. it's interesting I speak to a lot of people with adhd who have the similar kind of thing and I was actually having a chat with ChatGPT the other day and it was talking about this. My wife always like jokes.

[8:00] Oh, you've been talking with ChatGPT again. Have you? Oh, yeah, and but I was asking this question about ADHD and money and it was saying that a lot of people with ADHD are more focused or more aligned with That's maybe something we can come back to, Janet. I wanted to, before we go down that rabbit hole, and we'll probably go down that later, but We've known each other for a while. I was trying to think. It was, I think I first met you in 2015 in Manchester at New Media Europe. You were speaking there. I was speaking there.

[8:42] This was a conference. I don't know how to describe it. but new media, it was a new media conference. and we've we've worked with each other. You've, put, a lot of conferences, events on, that's been fun. And you've put a lot of creativity into that. You've, you, putting in, music as well.

[9:04] And what's your, what's when it comes to not just your events, but your business, how much, how important is that creativity in your business? And do you think that comes through from a, like an, ADHD lens?

[9:20] Janet: Yeah. It's interesting. I've never really thought about that because you just do what you just do what you don't you? And you just. You just, create things. But, yeah. I think the boredom thing obviously comes into it quite a lot. I really struggle if I'm bored with something. The minute I've lost interest in something it's just, unbearable.

[9:48] And I find it sounds really privileged, but, like When I speak to people who tell me that they hate their job and they've been going there for 20 years and they hate their job, everything about it, I'm just like, why don't you just leave, like, why don't you do something else, or, I, it, literally I just cannot comprehend how you can just keep, showing, because it would make me so, depressed, if I had to do that, so I think the creativity is, it's almost like you're amusing yourself, I get very bored very easily, And I get bored of the sound of my own voice, the sound of my own content.

[10:26] It's so, much as it would be quicker and easier to do things the same way every time. I feel like every time I've done an event, or every time I've launched something, or every time I've created something, I'm always looking for, new ways to approach it. And part of it is just to keep myself amused, because if I can't keep myself interested, I'm just awful.

[10:48] I would just procrastinate and do nothing and get down in the dumps. And so it's almost like part of, if you're not creating something new or you're not finding a new way to do something, it's I love this. I get like a buzz inside me. It literally is like a buzz, like a thrill from doing something new or doing something a different way.

[11:13] That's what inspires me to take action. If I haven't got that buzz, it's really hard. And again, it sounds really privileged, doesn't it? And really Oh God, poor me. I can't do anything unless I'm, but I'm sure Like when that buzz and excitement is there, you can move mountains, but if it's not there, you can just rot.

[11:32] Yeah.

[11:39] Ian: ADHD is a blessing and a curse like the blessing in the sense is that you have this divergent thinking is what makes you tick this creativity and People love that. It's like it's you know, you can see why some people would say that's a superpower That's your superpower Janet, but on the flip side Don't you sometimes think it would be a lot easier if I was neurotypical, and I might hate my job, but I could just power on through it.

[12:06] But you talk about those people who hate their job, but carry on doing it. It seems to me from what you're saying that you physically just could not do that. You just would not be able to do that. So you're in this situation where you having to reinvent yourself, you're having to do all these new things, which is a lot harder.

[12:25] arguably more fun, but it's harder.

[12:28] Janet: it's hard and I think there's a lot of self loathing that can come with it as well. literally, before we got on this call, I was talking to my husband and I was just having a massive, breakdown. He was saying, what's wrong with you? You don't seem yourself, you seem down, quiet and stuff.

[12:47] And I was like, oh, because, and it was all self loathing about why I didn't do this earlier, why I procrastinated on this, why I didn't do enough of that, why I didn't do, it's just constant. And then, But when I compare the amount of effort and the amount of time and often how much further I will go than other people to make sure people understand what's expected of them and you know you've seen my events and like the way that we would communicate with our speakers and you know get people involved and all the reminders and whatever like I feel like but even for me Even going, 10 extra miles is never far enough.

[13:28] And this is self loathing that comes with it because I often have my best ideas, like literally just as, two weeks later than I needed to have them. So I'm in a constant state of but I literally cannot be creative. It's funny because I think you and I have both come up, come across people in business who, do everything.

[13:57] I think you're, more organized than I am, but like much further ahead than say I would. And it's not like I'm being difficult by going, Oh, I'm not doing it. I'm being, it's literally that if I do something six weeks ahead of it'll be crap, because there's no, The inspiration isn't there.

[14:18] there is this kind of almost like I need a fire under my backside. to get that spark. And it comes too late. And it's like stressful because it, because you know it'll come, but you don't know when it'll come. And then once you've had that, Oh my God, no, this is a much better way to do it. I was going to do it like that, but that's, Oh my God, you just have to do it like that.

[14:41] But then, you're up. up all night or getting up at four o'clock in the morning to finish things or, and then you're stressing out everybody else around you because you've suddenly had this great idea and you need this, and this, and you're asking people to do, to work late or to do things that they weren't expecting to do and, my mind works at a million miles an hour and I'm really like, why didn't they get what I said?

[15:07] and does that make sense? And it's it's almost like a constant, Cycle of self loathing like you're doing these, you actually look if you look objectively at what you've done Like you've done something amazing but All you can see is all the bitch you didn't do or

[15:25] the bitch

[15:25] you

[15:25] could have done

[15:26] Ian: All the negatives. Yeah, this is such a, such an ADHD thing. And I think since being diagnosed and understanding More about ADHD. This has brought a lot more clarity and it's it took away some of the self loathing, but I've since realized that self loathing can often be a tactic or almost a strategy that we use or the part of our brain that's involved with us.

[15:53] Uses. This is something that, my friend, Dr. Tamara Razia has talked about, which she talks about six bad tools that we can use. some, sometimes that's procrastination. Sometimes that's anger. Sometimes that's avoidance, and we're waiting for our brains to fire up to give us the stimulation that we need to actually be motivated to do the task.

[16:16] But as we get older, Tamara was saying that some of those earlier tools that we use, they're just not enough to give us the motivation. So the final one that we use is that self loathing. And that's often because that negative side of that, negative emotions, that gives us a lot of stimulation. It's almost more stimulation than the positive side of things. so is that been your experience this, even though, intellectually, you've done a good job if you stop to think and I'd be, like Janet's events are amazing. They are, some of the best events I've been to. People who say people with ADHD are disorganized, like Janet is like, everything is so super organized.

[17:04] She thinks of everything. And I know you're probably going to object to some of those things and think, yes, but, how much of that is your experience? What I've just said?

[17:13] Janet: I do think that I pull it out the bag and I think I do think often of things other people don't think of and every time I do an event I think about You Or I'll go to another event and I'll see something that made me feel uninvolved or, felt like a bit slapdash or whatever.

[17:32] And I'll be like, or I'll see something really good and I'll be like, Oh, that's a great idea. Maybe I could develop that idea this way or whatever. and yeah, I think I do put on really good events because I think of everything. But I've also burnt myself out. The last event I had, I practically had nervous breakdowns, Some of the things were external to the actual event, but I put myself under so much pressure to do everything so perfectly. And the amount of content, that, if you want to communicate really well with people and ensure that, nothing's left to chance, excuse me, I'm going to cough.

[18:10] I've done really well not to cough up until this point. Sorry. But I know they're really good. And I know they're a cut above what other people do, even people who do great events, because I know, but I do sometimes wonder at what cost. And like my husband has this, has this phrase that he uses just enough.

[18:37] and that's his motto in life. Just enough to get by. Actually his work is much better than just enough, but it's a kind of funny thing that we talk about, the idea of just doing enough. and I do think as well, I sometimes wonder whether part of this compulsion to do everything more perfectly than other people and to go that extra mile and to think of all the things other people haven't thought of, might also come from those experiences you've had as a child when because he's slightly different and, I used to forget my books a lot at school.

[19:15] I was a bit messy, I had quite bad handwriting and I had this pervading sense of that I was much clever, cleverer than people gave me credit for and that for some reason people always, Like just seemed to miss, I was clever, but like they didn't realize how clever I was. And I feel like somehow there's a kind of, because I think a lot of ADHD people will have experienced that kind of shame.

[19:39] like at school I was brilliant at English history and RE music. everything else, like I was just just about scraping by because I wasn't that interested. But once I got, when I was a kid, I was good at everything. But and to almost have that shame of kind of, knowing that I was exceptional English, like I used to get like the best marks in my year, whatever context I was in, I'd be getting the best marks, the highest grades.

[20:10] But then I'd be in my maths class and I'd think, God, this teacher thinks I'm really stupid. And all those kind of conflicting, like experiences. Of feeling shameful because you're not as organised as other people or you're late with your deadline or your handwriting's a mess or whatever it might be.

[20:29] And then, I think I've got this real compulsion to prove myself and to be better and to be perfect and not have any mistakes. and yeah, I think that, does that kind of resonate with you?

[20:44] Ian: Yeah, there's this perfectionism aspect that's definitely part of ADHD. And I would call myself a recovering perfectionist. I try not to do it because I just know, I've been burnt out, a couple of times. And that is because I want to do everything right, just to make it perfect is another reason why I think I probably flocked to using live video, because.

[21:10] It feels it felt like at the time this perfect antidote to perfectionism because it just meant I'd get it done, because it was never going to be perfect. But, that, that was quite a tough road. Interestingly at school, though, I think I always, I, always thought, I was a lot worse than I was. I always questioned my own intelligence and I still sometimes do that today. so it, but I think, these are just maybe different coping mechanisms because there is this, I think a lot of us with ADHD are not so good at self observant, observance. We, there's a disconnect between what we think we are and what we actually are. So in terms of our, it could be our intelligence.

[21:57] It could be our social skills. It could be any of those things. we can have a lot of that and, our brains are very good at making stuff up about

[22:06] this is something I've learned about the, what's called the default mode network in our brains. Like it just is great at making.

[22:14] absolute rubbish up about ourselves. And then we believe it because it's really good at it. I want to, so we, this has been such a, an ADHD conversation. We've been all over the place. but I want to, so I, do want to go back to your childhood, but before we do that, I want to ask you about your kind of the start of your realization of ADHD and autism as well.

[22:37] So can you tell us, Maybe when you started, maybe not when you first started to feel that you were different, but that maybe there was a name for this. What was your journey towards getting assessed in the first place and how did that change things for you?

[22:55] Janet: I'm trying to think now because, and, I just mentioned this when it, came into my head. But the other thing that was quite interesting about I was, I got diagnosed and I was obsessed with ADHD for like about two years. And now I'm actually a bit bored of it. and, and, which is so ADHD, isn't it?

[23:16] and, now we're talking about it now, I'm interested cause we're talking about it again,

[23:21] but

[23:21] it's

[23:22] Ian: you're not too, but you're not going to

[23:23] Janet: I'm not gonna fall asleep, but I thought you might find that amusing, but I, devoured every book, every podcast, and, totally hyper focused, knew everything about it, and then suddenly I was like, ugh, screw it, I'll pass, I'm not interested in ADHD, but, and I am, I still am, I still sometimes listen to podcasts, I still sometimes read about it, but, but anyway, I can't even remember what you asked me, but it was about, oh yeah, the realization, it's that classic story, isn't it, of always thinking that you were different, And I find myself wondering, I find myself wondering a lot about a lot of things, but, I wonder whether everybody feels like that.

[23:58] Does everybody go through their childhood? Like I, I had, I was having like, therapy, for about a year or two. And I used to ask the therapist this all the time. She never used to answer. I said does everybody like think the things that I think, because I quite often have moments where I'll be sitting somewhere and something that I think is boring and I'll be like.

[24:21] I think everyone else must think this is really boring. they're all pretending. I went to this wine tasting thing, and, everybody was like, and then I was like, God, this is so boring. Like, why is anyone interested? and I was really genuinely just looking around, just thinking, is everyone pretending to this wine tasting?

[24:37] Because to me it's just, so boring. And I actually asked this lady, who was, like, really into her wine, genuinely, what, Tell me, what is it that, that makes you so excited about it? and I still didn't understand it, but I was just literally thinking, is everyone pretending to enjoy this?

[24:54] Cause this is just like just not. But, and I spent a lot of time wondering if people were pretending like, like we're in a play, like the Truman show or a TV show and everyone's just acting and pretending they like things that they don't. But anyway, I've still forgotten your first question, which, what was it again?

[25:08] The, it was about, yeah. so anyway, so I did feel really different. For me, a lot of it was around, friendship. I felt quite disconnected. and I used to talk to my mum a lot all the time about why haven't I got a best friend. I always used to feel like, I had lots of friends, sort of acquaintances.

[25:28] It's still, right now, I'm exactly the same. I've got lots of acquaintances. But I was never anybody's best friend. And I You know, everybody else seemed to have a best friend or a little group and I always was straddled between different groups, and it wasn't like I didn't get invited places or didn't get left out or whatever, but I just always felt like I was on the edges of everything.

[25:52] and I think some of that was my fault, because I think to be a good friend, especially if you're a girl, I think, There's a certain amount of, you have to show up for things, you have to do things you don't like doing. And I don't like, showing up to things or spending time doing things I don't want to do just because that's what the friend group do.

[26:13] I've never liked that. And I can think of lots of, Occasions where I didn't do things because I just didn't want to do them. It wasn't that interesting, but thinking After a while people start asking you, and then I would get interested in things or I would have strong interest in things, and I'd just disappear and then you'd disappear and then people So I felt quite disconnected and also I felt like That, that this kind of, this kind of almost obsessive quality I had about it.

[26:42] If I was interested in something, I was just obsessed with it. And I was just like doing that and that's all I wanted to do or talk about. And I didn't see that in other people. I felt like people were I was always striving, reaching for something, or and I couldn't sit still, not that I couldn't sit still, but I just couldn't, I couldn't be relaxed and be content or, And so these were all things that I just always thought about myself. yeah. And I thought, I'd look again, I'd be looking around going, but everybody else seems to be content. Everybody else seems to be just getting on and like they're happy with what's going on. Like, why am I just always looking for something else or looking for the next kick or the next high or the next kind of, and so I think it was always, was that kind of sense.

[27:24] I can't really remember. I think that I'm trying to remember what it was, but I think I have a, I can be very impulsive, so I can leave jobs or leave relationships Like, situations, just on a turn of it, like When I was younger, when I, before I was married, it's a miracle I'm married, I've been married for so long.

[27:47] But I used to be going out with someone and then I would just suddenly would get overcome with, Oh my God, I don't want to be in this relationship. and literally it would come over me in like a moment and I would just feel overwhelmed. And and I was like, I can't be in this relationship.

[28:03] I just I used to just get I don't know, I was just impulsive and I could just leave a relationship or a situation or just literally like that and cause absolute havoc. I was terrible with money, and I, would spend money that I didn't have. I would know that I was going into my overdraft when I was spending money, but there was just like no, I don't know, I just, I wasn't thinking beyond, so that meant I was making bad decisions all the time.

[28:36] and yeah, I felt like a fish out of water. I just felt like I'd be with a group. but I wasn't with a group and actually, the first time I started to feel more like I belonged was when I started to get interested in entrepreneurship because when you start meeting people who are just like, you get to the point where everyone you meet has left their job or career or they've like just had this crazy idea they're gonna do something or other and they're just doing it and you When you sit and talk to people like that, you find you have a lot in common with them because you're all although you might be doing slightly different things, you're all living your life in a kind of unconventional way.

[29:18] But I think before that I just always felt I felt frustrated at myself, and I always felt slightly, not, I've never been depressed, but I felt low, a lot of, just a lot of the time. I had a lot of emotional highs and lows. Yeah, I just, I don't know if any of that kind of, I know I've explained it better in the past when I was more obsessed with ADHD maybe before I got bored of it, but, does that kind of make sense?

[29:58] Ian: It does make sense. So that, so you had all those experiences. What then led you to get wanting to seek, or thinking that it might be ADHD or there was a name for

[30:14] Janet: I think

[30:14] Ian: and that next

[30:16] Janet: I think I was probably Googling, I was probably like Googling because I probably thought I was, I knew I wasn't depressed because I had friends who suffered from depression or, and I was it doesn't seem like that, but I don't seem quite right.

[30:32] And I'm guessing, I can't even remember the moment that I probably just I googled stuff and then something came up and I read it and I thought God that sounds like me and then I went like a rabbit hole, turned a rabbit hole. And I remember I listened to the podcast which I ended up being a guest on Tracy Otsuka's what's it called her podcast?

[30:51] ADHD

[30:53] women,

[30:55] smart

[30:55] ass women. And so I used to listen to that and I would listen to all of the stories and think God, that is just totally me. and then, So it's 2021. So I think I was quite an early adopter as it were. and, I think I was one of the first kind of entrepreneurial people that I knew to get diagnosed.

[31:15] And yeah, and as soon as, I read the list, it was almost like, I was wanting to cry when I read the list of symptoms, cause I was like, God, yeah, that, that is, All of those things are me, that is, me and that kind of explains why I'm the way I am. So anyway, I finally answered your question after about, four different

[31:39] detours.

[31:39] Ian: so No, that's fine. So you, read up about it. You thought, this sounds like a DHD. So what was the next thing? did you like go to your gp? Did you like, how did you actually did, how did you do it? Because for a lot of people. this, bit, they, might think they have it, so this is another question actually, just answer this question first, because I think this is important.

[32:02] A lot of people say, yeah, I probably have ADHD, I know I have ADHD, but, what's the point in getting diagnosed? Why, do I need to do

[32:10] Janet: I felt like if I understood what it was or what these behaviours were, then I, would be able to develop more self awareness and, perhaps change my behaviours but become more aware of them, become more forgiving of myself maybe, and be able to, possibly come up with some strategies or, because the other thing as well is, obviously when you work with other people and like you're trying to build a team, then you're making a right mess of it because you're, you work the way that you work, and you work a completely different way to other people.

[32:47] And it's, it's hard to, it's hard to, do that. yeah, so then I could have gone on a waiting list, but I decided at the time that I would seek a private diagnosis. And I don't know why I think I had the budget at the time. I just thought, I'd rather just You know, find out. So I research and I've, this was before all of the stuff came up, about these dodgy people.

[33:12] So I found, a lady, she's called Dr. Sally Cubbins. and she'd worked at the Mortally and, I looked, I wanted to find somebody who'd worked in the NHS, who had, extensive experience, who's It's an older lady, obviously quite a long career, and I did all the tests.

[33:33] I was very, one thing I struggled with was, that I didn't want to tell my parents because my parents have always been a bit, they're just of that generation where you just get on with stuff. and I remember having this panic when they sent me all these forms and said, you need to get someone in your family.

[33:52] I can't. And what was really at the back of my mind then was that, My brother, who's since been diagnosed with autism and ADHD, and very classic sort of presentation, that he was like the troublesome one. And I felt like if I'd gone and go, Oh, I ADHD. They'd be like, Oh no, it's your brother.

[34:16] That's the, you're the good child. you're, your brother's the one that causes all the problems. and it was funny though, cause I think I said in my email, I, can't ask anyone in my family to do this. and because I've got a sibling who, he's the one, he's the neurodivergent one.

[34:38] He just isn't diagnosed. And I think when I said that in a sense, I was almost giving myself away . because I was saying I've got a neurodivergent sibling, and ironically, my mom is the most A DHD. She's not diagnosed, but she's the most A DHD person. Like proper can't stop talking. Can't, she just.

[34:57] She's really classic presentation. and, yeah, I, She said to me straight away, having done all the, yeah, definitely, got it. and I tried, I, was reluctant to try medication because I'd never even, a lot of my friends have had, medication for depression and things like that.

[35:20] I'd never had anything for the head as it were. And I was scared. And because I'd never really been into drugs when I think I was younger, I was a bit scared. I had this idea that I'd take it and I'd be like popping, and I'd be like, like tripping or whatever. and it, had the effect.

[35:33] Opposite where I was like, Oh my God, this is what it feels like to have a really quiet brain. And this is also, this is not what it feels like, not to feel low. I just had this kind of like sadness or kind of low, just lowness like all the time. and to feel yourself perk up almost and be a lot brighter.

[35:57] so yeah, so that was back in 2021. and like I said, I was a bit obsessed with it for a couple of years. And, learned everything about it, went down rabbit holes and, wrote a lot about it. And then in my usual way got a bit bored of it. but, I say I've got bored of it, I've got bored of, researching about it endlessly or whatever.

[36:16] again, I do sometimes, I might pick out a podcast to listen to and, I do sometimes read about it. But, I, I'm just more aware of myself and, the way that I behave because, depending on what's going on in my life, I can be more or less ADHD than other times. I think I'm 50 now and I gather that a lot of women of my age, that the hormones can make some symptoms worse apparently.

[36:47] and then, You mentioned the autism diagnosis, and the thing about the autism diagnosis, I I go through phases where I think no, I haven't got that's a mistake. not because I think there's anything wrong with it, but what happened was, I, had a really, I had something happen to my personal life that was really, difficult.

[37:05] And it was a horrible thing to happen, and it would have been horrible anyway, but, I just, I, It brought out behaviours in me that I know were there, but it, it highlighted to me some areas where if I'm not regulated, if I'm not in good, order, it can really, I'm trying to, it's really hard to explain it, but there were kind of things that weren't explained by the ADHD.

[37:38] I've almost got like the other side. So I am like, as you said, I'm like organized, do everything on the last minute. But actually the way that I do everything is like with precision, systems and lists and order. And I do everything in a very particular ways. and I was just noticing some behaviors in me that were odds with.

[38:00] The ADHD, side of things. And I think it was exacerbated because I was going through something really, difficult. And, it was basically like, I've also read that women, when they get medicated for ADHD, if they are more of an all ADHD variety, that it, That, it deals with the A DHD symptoms and then the kind of more autistic symptoms.

[38:23] I, I've got this theory, which has got no gr, no grounding whatsoever that like further down the line we might find that there's just a brand of A DHD, which is more autistic if you see what means. So it's more of a kind of a DH, D and I'm that, but I think I was experiencing. Life and the world, like all of the things that features of autism, things like, sensory, issues, communications, everything's just ramped up to a million.

[38:57] And I think what I've noticed is that when I'm, when, like at the moment, I'm, I'm in a fairly sort of good place. There's nothing going on touch wood outside of my that's causing me too much worry or distress. But I think when, I'm trying to explain it, but I think those parts get really, heightened, particularly around emotional regulation.

[39:24] I, do find it really, difficult to, To regulate my emotions, not in a kind of way that I'm like shouting at people or something, but I, it can just become, it can just take everything over. I can become so stressed and de stressed, distressed is the word, not de stressed, distressed.

[39:46] so yeah, so I actually then went and, looked into that as well and, Apparently I have both, but I think that I'm, I think I'm more ADHD this theory, which is totally, not backed up by evidence, but that we may well discover as we get to know more ADHD, which is almost like an autistic, ADHD, if that makes sense.

[40:09] Ian: Yeah, definitely. Oh, that's my phone ringing in the background. I can't do anything about it. So there we go. I'm but I'm

[40:15] Janet: live

[40:16] Ian: not be a perfectionist. Yeah. So that's interesting. That's really interesting. Because I think women in particular are more difficult to Be diagnosed. I think from what I gather, women tend to be much better at masking the men, like generally speaking, we're all over the place.

[40:38] that's been my experience. but yeah, it's, I, think, a lot of the things you're talking about there that you could possibly describe as, autism things like, for example, noise sensitivity, emotional dysregulation, things like that. There's a few other things that you mentioned, for me that they're definite things or maybe hyper focus on like organization and structure.

[41:06] some, people might say, they're autism traits, but to me, for, my, for me, they're definitely ADHD, like the, the inability for me to be able to, if there's too many sounds going on, I'd find it very difficult to listen into one person. Who's speaking with I just can't, do get all of that.

[41:26] And that's because I believe like my prefrontal cortex, it just

[41:30] can't deal with all the incoming information. And I think when it comes to organization, I don't know about for you, but for me, like I, because I don't want to feel anxious, I, need to get everything as organized as possibly can. And frequently, sometimes I actually enjoy some of that as well.

[41:49] Like I do enjoy processes and. Spreadsheets, please, don't judge me. so I think, yeah, and then the other thing I was just going to say is I think personality comes into play a lot more. your personality plus ADHD is going to look different to my personality plus ADHD. So we're all, different.

[42:12] And it's

[42:14] Janet: I think the thing for me, I think, was black and, was black and white thinking. I do have quite strong black and white, I'm very rule orientated, and things are either right or wrong. And, they're either true or they're not true, or they're factual or not factual. And I, again, I think because I was going through something which really brought that out, my black and white thinking was off the scale.

[42:41] and, I, so my brother's autistic and, and I remember my sister in law telling me this story about how, she, would come in the house and she knew that he was writing an email, and, I laughed because I know that, so basically I'm the best complainer in the world. my daughter was unwell at the end of last year, early this year, and I, And I was like, okay. Nothing got past me with the NHS and all the appointments and whatever, I was totally on it. but, I can't let it go, I'm like a dog with a bone. And, and so if something is unfair, if it's unjust, if somebody's trying to tell me that something true that isn't, I will just, I'll write that email, I'll write that complete, and I will, take apart every single argument and everything, in that kind of way that gets right up people's noses.

[43:38] And, and that's what I went about the emails, because people don't like it. They don't like you telling them that they're wrong, even if they are wrong. And, I think I had a lot of realizations about things. Whereas I thought I was a good. I thought I had good social skills because I'm, and I think, I do, I think, and a lot of women, I think they learn, you learn things, how to do things.

[44:01] However, I feel that I had missed, that there's some things that I'd missed where people have maybe got annoyed with me or got, offended by things that I'd said or whatever, Because I hadn't realised that it wasn't okay. I'd missed, I think I started to realise I'd missed some social things, and in my kind of autistic, black and white thinking, that I couldn't see any other way.

[44:33] I couldn't see that somebody might make, even now, the idea that, someone could look at certain things and say, Oh, I don't know, it's not so black and white. no, that's, I actually find it quite

[44:51] most distressing that, when people are not telling the truth or they're trying to present that, and I thought was something else I was going to say about that.

[45:00] what was it? but yeah, and, but those traits were really heightened and they're still there and they get triggered like big time. if something comes along to trigger it, but like I'm saying, I feel like. I definitely have got traits in those areas.

[45:18] And I was experiencing them at mega level.

[45:22] But I do wonder whether, further down the line, like I say, they might, go, actually there's a brand of ADHD which is like this all DHD, which has got, which has actually got these real strong features. And that would be, me. yeah. There was something else important I was going to say, but I've forgotten.

[45:41] Ian: It'll come back to you. It'll come back to you and just feel, to answer. Feel free to interrupt, but so a few years later, it is obviously a few years later since you got diagnosed, you've since become bored with it, but

[45:56] Janet: Is that going to be the episode title? I'm bored

[45:58] with

[45:58] having

[45:59] Ian: yeah, I'm bored with a DHD, but clearly it, it did make a big impact on you.

[46:06] the idea and it. Now you're in this position a few years later where you have, it seems like you have a lot more kind of self, knowledge and awareness of the way you think. Your brain works and i'm interested in how has that affected your life Both in your personal and family life, but also in your business.

[46:30] Are there any things that you've put into place? You've mentioned medication. That's one aspect, but i'm sure there are others

[46:39] Janet: I was thinking about this earlier, and I don't think that you can't cure ADHD, can you? and what I find happens is I will discover something that works quite well for me. like I might have a way of planning or working, whatever, and then it'll work well for a while, and then it doesn't, and I get bored of it.

[47:03] and, do you know what I mean? So you might,

[47:06] Ian: sounds familiar

[47:07] Janet: you go, oh brilliant, this is working really well, I'm doing, 15 minutes of this every day, whatever, and then like you're bored of it, or something happens. I think where I probably am a bit better, And not perfect by any means, is I think I do have a bit more self acceptance.

[47:27] and I think I'm getting better at, and I think having, I had had therapy but it was specifically coaching, around ADHD and neurodivergency. And just accept, and accepting that, Like when you're an AD, something I think about myself actually, and I've noticed this cause I've taken on a few new projects this year.

[47:51] And I think sometimes my enthusiasm can be too much for some people. Cause like I'm not up here going, let's do this. and I've always known that. And I've always known that like my pace is a lot faster than other people. And I'm Oh, we need to have a meeting about, let's just do it.

[48:12] we've decided we're going to do it. And. So in some ways it's helped me to recognize, oh, I'm doing that thing. It doesn't make me bad, but I need to slow down because this is too much, for other people. I need to just calm it down a little bit. but then the other side of it is That's how I am.

[48:35] And actually people, who are not like that,

[48:45] they're not, this sounds awful, but they're not really the kind of people that I would feel like inspired to spend time with anyway. So I think I used to spend a lot of time worrying, like for example, about being part of friend groups that I didn't want to be in. because, I like being around buzzy people who've got ideas and people who are like telling me about their project that they're on or whatever it is, even if it's not.

[49:08] Like anything that I'm interested, but and people were just sitting there going, getting a new conservatory, nothing wrong with the new conservatory, but, and, we're going to see the mother in law at Christmas and yeah, still in the same job, Chris is

[49:26] getting a

[49:26] bonus at

[49:27] Yeah. It's more talk like, yeah. And, I think for a long time, I felt like I had to I wanted to be part of those groups, even though I didn't want to be part of those groups because I found it boring. And even things like, it was my, my running group, they have this thing every Christmas where they have a social.

[49:50] And, it basically involves going to a noisy restaurant, sitting on long tables, can't hear anyone, having to game it so you don't sit next to the worst person all night or whatever. And again, I find myself thinking, Is everybody just pretending that they enjoy going to a really noisy restaurant where you can't hear anyone?

[50:13] I actually get, I don't know about you, I actually get quite, I find myself feeling quite angry, if you're, if someone keeps trying to talk to you and you can't hear because of the background noise, I actually, I start to get angry, like I want to snap at people, I think that's not good.

[50:24] Like I don't snap at people, but I feel like I want to snap at people. And so I've just started saying no, I've just started saying, oh, no. and something funny happened to me the other day where, someone hugged me. and again, it's not that I'm not, it's not that I don't like, hugs, I just don't see the point of, you know when people go around, I think, I'm sure we've hugged when we've met up before, whatever, but, You know those sort of people who just have to hug everybody whenever they, see them or don't

[50:52] Ian: Yeah. Yeah

[50:54] Janet: Unless I'm genuinely happy to see someone, I don't want to hug them. And so something happened at my running grit the other day where somebody, went to hug me and I actually said, I'm, not really a hugger, because I don't really know this person very well and I didn't want to hug him and he was all sweaty and I was all sweaty.

[51:12] And then everyone laughed because I think everyone knew that I wasn't a hugger. And then everybody else proceeded to hug me, which was just excruciating. Just accepting those kind of things about yourself. it's okay, not to be a hugger, and it's okay to actually, and it's okay you can enjoy the parts that you like, but you don't have to go to the Christmas thing and sit there and want to kill everyone because you can't hear and It's small talk and I think I've got a bit better at just going, that's how I am. I don't know if any of that makes any sense.

[51:48] Ian: it does make a lot of sense and i've been at these kind of parties or you know Sometimes it's a a marketing event and there's a little party afterwards or gathering and There's a live band I'm supposed to be talking to each other. I just, and I, escaped to the toilet. It's I'll just have two minutes.

[52:11] I don't need, I'm not going because I need the toilet, but I'm just going just to have a little bit of, and then I go back and then I can cope with another five minutes. And it's, it is painful. It is really, it is painful. Excruciatingly painful and then I'm trying to listen to them and I don't have no idea what they're saying And I'm thinking well, do I do like a laugh at this point?

[52:31] But they might have said that a granddad has just died And like it's not good. It's not good. Um, and I think as

[52:39] Janet: of those moments where I find myself thinking, is everybody else in the world pretending it upset me? Because, Andrew and Pete's events, and they put on, these great events in Newcastle, but the bars, because they're young men, would be really, noisy. And I would walk, I remember once walking in, just going straight back out again, because I just can't stand it, because I just, I'm irritated because people are trying to watch me.

[52:59] I can't hear them. Like you say, they might have just said their granddad's died and you're not sure. And I just think surely everyone must be pretending everyone, everyone in this room is just and I have these massive exist existential kind of like crises in my head. 'cause I'm like, why are we living in a world where everyone is pretending that they like being in here?

[53:18] And then I think, they can't possibly, they must like it, but who likes shouting, and then I'm just like, my head, and, that's the other thing I think about ADHD, I think people don't often appreciate. I, met somebody recently who, he started talking to me and immediately I thought, he's ADHD, and, because he was, his, verbal output was like the inside of my head. But I think sometimes, I don't appear like that on the surface, I'm talking a lot now, but if you'd met me normally, I probably would seem fairly, calm most of the time. But, that chatter that's going on in your head the whole time, I sometimes say to my husband in the morning, I'll be like, Because I get up early than him, I'd be like, telling him all the things that I've thought about in the hour that I've been awake or something.

[54:09] And he's it just wears me out, just thinking about all the things that you've thought about.

[54:14] Ian: yeah,

[54:14] Janet: do it's, sometimes you just want to hit yourself over the head, because your head's just going round and round and round internal chatter, Yeah,

[54:25] it's incessant.

[54:27] Ian: it is tiring, but it is like that, that supercomputer, but, but it's in the kind of, it's almost like a really like a pocket calculator case or something. Or what, is it that, there's, I've also heard it's like a Lamborghini engine in a. in a Lada, brakes or something like that.

[54:49] But you've mentioned this a few times, the, whole idea of looking around other people in a situation thinking like, what are you doing? what are you, must be bored or you must hate this. And This is I feel like this a lot I've spoken to a lot of people with ADHD who feel like this that we're on the outside looking in We're feeling on the edge and we're looking in Thinking I feel like i'm the only one here.

[55:17] It's like surely everyone can't Like surely I'm not the only one. Like I sometimes it might be, it might be at our church. I'll be there and I feel there's loads of people around me and I know them all, but I almost feel like I'm at, on the outside looking in. I might be at an event.

[55:34] You've mentioned events that we've been to, and again, I feel. Sometimes like I'm on the outside looking in is that it seems like that's a common experience For you and has that Become easier since being diagnosed

[55:51] Janet: I don't know. It's weird. I've become more aware of it something that pops into my head when you were talking then was about so I go so this is a bizarre thing that I you get involved in when you Hate you actually, but I'm a run leader. So I'm a qualified run leader England Athletics and I run LEAD with different groups, but one of them is attached to a Baptist church, and I'm not a Baptist, I'm a Catholic.

[56:19] But on a Sunday, they have this they have a run on a Sunday morning, and then they have a church, but it's in like a, it's not real church, I thought it was great. The first week I went they invited me in for coffee. I was like, this is great, like 15 minutes, like no, like full on church service or whatever.

[56:35] having been brought up a Catholic. Turns out they do Bible study elsewhere, but basically, you do your run, you go in, you have this breakfast and, Penny the, the, she's the, pastor, whatever you call it. Vicar, female vicar with her in the Baptist Church. She gives, it's like a grown up assembly.

[56:53] It's lovely. She's lovely They're lovely people and I really enjoy going even though I'm not part of the Baptist Church And it's just a lovely community but She shows a video every week, right? And it's a clip of a film. And I remember feeling quite sad the first few times I went because I can't follow films or videos out of context.

[57:15] So so there, again, every single week she does this thing where she has her theme, Which is usually related to the, so she, it's, she is a general thing about forgiveness or friendship or looking after each other and then, and then Simon said or whatever, and then it comes back to the Bible.

[57:34] But she, but she, uses popular films and she shows clips of them and I just can't follow them. And they're often funny and everyone's laughing and I'm like, it's very isolating to be sitting in a room where everyone's laughing, and you can't follow the video. Or you're just not finding it funny.

[57:52] Like they're watching Mr. Bean and I was just like, everyone's laughing. And again, I'm looking at my, they're all pretending to laugh because this isn't funny. but it's even less funny out of context as well. When you're sitting there and again, that might be to do with my auditory processing.

[58:09] I remember at school I used to struggle when they used to show films. I could never concentrate. Like when they used to show films in the classroom, I just couldn't, I couldn't concentrate on them. And it wasn't. The right environment for me, and I would literally would all go over my head and That's quite isolating, I think, and I still, now, at first, I and then when you see people, you see everyone's laughing, and you think, oh, again, are they all pretending?

[58:37] Are they all pretending to laugh? Or is everyone in this room genuinely finding it funny? Or genuinely following what just happened? yeah,

[58:48] Ian: And maybe the truth is that there's a mixture so a mixture there's some people who are masking and are just like pretending to laugh But there are probably generally people there that are finding it funny and we're just all different and That can be difficult to come to

[59:09] Janet: I'd like to go around and poll everyone and just ask everybody, Is it okay if I just ask you, did you really find that funny? no judgement, because,

[59:16] I,

[59:17] yeah.

[59:17] Ian: I could just see you with your microphone that next time you get you there. So what did you find that funny?

[59:24] Janet: But it's also feeling like it's not polite. Not to laugh because everyone else is laughing, but just be like I've got no idea what's going on there and I feel like a prat because I can't follow it's like it's something like a Disney film or something and I can't follow What's going on? But maybe it's because I'm just not interested and I feel like my I was enjoying because I'm quite an oral I like listening to things.

[59:47] I find it easy to learn when I can

[59:49] listen. yeah. and I do wonder sometimes whether it's because it's interrupted my flow. I'm listening to Penny and she's telling a nice story and whatever and then she goes and shows a video and spoils it all because then, because it, your focus is taken elsewhere.

[0:03] Ian: I think that makes sense. and again, we're all the ADHD is not just one thing that I keep on saying this. There is many types of ADHD as there are people with ADHD. And Sometimes, often it's ADHD and something else. So like for me, when I got diagnosed, it was ADHD plus anxiety. But I like for, years, I've wondered whether I was dyslexic because I really struggled with English comprehension exercises.

[0:34] I, was very good at creative writing, but the comprehension exercises I struggled with. So I wondered whether I was dyslexic. And somebody said to me that people with ADHD don't have learning difficulties, but they often have a difficulty with learning. And it just might mean that for you, certain ways of consuming content or learning, You don't find helpful but other ways you do and it's a case of learning what works for you I used to beat myself up for I used to read loads as a kid And then I just really struggled and now I just I listen to books.

[1:16] I listen to podcasts So and I watch videos and I still Sometimes beat myself up because I wish I was a reader. My daughter is reading all these mate You'd be so proud of her. She's reading all these hmm. Mmm. some of these books She's reading But we're all different, aren't we, in the way we learn?

[1:36] And it sounds like you've become, you've almost that self acceptance in the way your brain works. That's certainly become

[1:47] Janet: and it made me think about, I think, I'm sure we've talked about this before, about reading music, so I'm not, I was never brilliant at maths, I was alright when I was a kid, but once it, they started introducing letters, and it, the pace was just too fast for me, I just needed them to slow it down, but I struggled with music theory, like I found it hard, it's quite mathematical, but also I think about it now, I can read music, and, but reading the music, playing the instrument or singing or whatever, like there's a lot going on at the same time.

[2:18] Driving, oh my god, we could, that could be a whole other subject. It took me so many goes to get my driving test. But what's a real shame about it, and I'm sure we've talked about this before, is that I've got a really good ear. And when I was a kid, like I, I used to harmonize to the adverts, like when I was a little kid.

[2:37] and I can harm, I can, harmonize by ear. I can. Come up with a harmony line in my head. I can like, and I didn't realize that I'm only realizing now that not many people can do that, without any, anyone teaching them how to do it. Like I could just do it. and instead of developing that skill, I've stopped reading music.

[3:01] So I do read music, but what I mean is I just pay from chord charts. I just teach myself by ear and I wish that I'd let musically, I wish I'd just Obviously it's great to have that skill because you can always go back and check something and you've got that grounding, but reading music I actually think held me back because I was so focused on getting it right, every aspect of it perfect and right, that actually I didn't develop some of the skills that I had that actually, are really, useful to, to be able to build up.

[3:37] hear something, play it by ear, vamp along with chords, harmony, do harmony, put in harmony lines and stuff. And I think it's a shame that, if I understood, maybe if I knew that I had ADHD when I was younger, I may have gone, you know what, I've learned how to read music now, but actually I'm going to develop these other skills because

[3:59] I've got this natural ability here, like, why not, to worry too much about that?

[4:06] And I think that's a shame because I think, sometimes And I think that it is to do some, with, I don't know, some kind of sensory or auditory processing or something like that, or just too many things going on at once. But it's a shame when you look back and you think, God, that's held you back, really.

[4:26] Ian: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. but you've realized that you did have this amazing scale of playing, singing by ear, improvising, which is a skill that a lot of, I'm, as I, went into the kind of classical world of music and trained that there's a lot of people that got amazing sight reading skills, but they don't, have the improvisation

[4:50] skills or playing or singing by ear. So I think sometimes we can, I'd mentioned this about the reading. I feel like I, I like bad because I, was struggling to, to, read a book. And I felt this almost like this being compelled to do it that way. I felt compelled when I was at music college that I had to go down the opera route, even though I didn't want to go down the opera route and sounded like at school, the youth felt.

[5:19] That you had to go down there. I need to be able to read music. And that's the way when actually there was another way, which was focusing in of that. But it is interesting that you have been doing that even if you might call this a small way, but you have been putting your music into your business.

[5:37] And this is one thing that we did. together in a few of your, events and actually bringing a bit of singing into it, which was so fun. like I was, so we were for people listening and watching who have no idea that this was because you did, you have the Christmas markets and we did a little Christmas theme.

[5:57] and then there was the courageous, content event where. We just put this song on and we're all singing on the screen. It was, a lot of fun.

[6:05] Janet: get courageous with your content. Because everyone in my house hates it.

[6:10] Ian: You

[6:10] Janet: yeah. I think we came up with it over Facebook Messenger, didn't we? singing back and forth to each other, but. and yeah, probably just. To finish, it's just the thing I keep meaning to mention the whole way through yet is my singing striders choir because, so I'd always had this idea, I do, I'm a runner, I do part, again this is probably this thing about bringing things together, but I am a runner and part run, if you don't know what it is, I'm sure a lot of people do now, it's a, timed run at 9am all over the country, all over the world.

[6:40] In fact, it gets people out in the community, moving, walking and running as well. But anyway, I'd always had this idea at Christmas because I used to love singing carols with the choir and stuff at Christmas. Wouldn't it be great to hear music a part run at Christmas? wouldn't it be great just to get to the finish and just have a little group of people just singing?

[6:57] Because I used to go carol singing with my mates around here and we'd just knock on people's door and we'd be singing in four part harmony. Again, and I'd probably, I'd be doing that for a wee while. And so I'd be like, so I just had this thing. I just thought I'm just going to do this. So I just reached out to some people and actually all the people from my old life who I used to sing with said no to me.

[7:18] but anyway, I just just thought I'm going to try and make it happen last year. So I did. So I just asked all these people, we ended up singing local park runs and then it went really well. it wasn't perfect or anything. Ian helped me. You did a session with me, didn't you, to help me. get everything, come up with a plan for everything.

[7:38] But anyway, it went really well. And then someone said to me at the end, Oh, that was so good. Wouldn't it be great if you could, sing at the London marathon? And, and then I thought, Oh, I wonder how you do that. And I set it to myself as a target for say 2025. And then it happened this year.

[7:59] We also did the London landmarks half marathon, and it was just that thing where I was just how do you do that? And I met somebody who. I worked for the company just at London Landmarks. I thought we can get booked for that. I agreed to do Great Manchester Run. oh my god, no idea how on earth, because I don't live in Manchester, live in Kent, how on earth I was gonna get enough singers and sort it out.

[8:20] But anyway, we made it happen. It was great. But I just thought, It's just like one step at a time, isn't it? And I think it's that thing about, I'm not afraid just to try something. put myself out there to ask people, for people to say no. And, I think there were some people at the start of it who I think thought it was a bit bonkers, but I knew in my head, I knew I could see it in my head.

[8:48] We've got these high vis jackets, with singing striders on the back. And I had the vision, I didn't have the clear, but I had the vision, I had the idea, and I knew if I could get enough people, I knew I could make it work, I knew it'd be brilliant. But I did have people, who were just like, yeah, that's not good.

[9:06] And because it wasn't like a normal choir as well, because it's it, the thing I don't like about choirs is that you spend a lot of time listening to other people sing and waiting for your turn to practice your part. Whereas I wanted to create something where, you know People could just sing and sing, and

[9:24] Ian: Hmm.

[9:24] Janet: sort of popular tunes and I've rewritten the lyrics to make them running themed for like popular things like Taylor Swift's Shake It Off and we do all the Queen and Eye of the Tiger masks.

[9:35] We've got like these yellow hats and stuff Yeah, as I'm saying this, you were talking about the creativity before like when I think about this like We were featured by the BBC on the BBC's home page on London Marathon Day. And it was amazing. So I was able to bring all of my skills together to get these photos and get this press coverage and stuff.

[9:53] It was amazing. But it's wacky, like a choir that specializes in singing at running events that dresses up in tight, wears tiger masks and like yellow hats. But it works. as I'm saying it, I don't think it sounds ridiculous, but it works. But I do think the ADHD part of you is, I was just I knew it was a good idea, and I knew if I could get the people together, and I could get the venues, and I knew it'd be great.

[10:18] And I think that's where ADHD is a superpower, because I just got a bit obsessed with it and I was just like, I'm going to make this happen, we're going to sing at the London Marathon and, we did it, and we did it a year earlier than I thought. but I've knocked on a lot of doors, I've had a lot of no's from people, I've had a lot of people who looked at me weird like I was silly and all, so I can't even remember where that came from, but I just remember I kept, thinking the whole way through I wanted to mention it because, I think my Singing Striders choir is probably one of the most ADHD inventions in the world.

[10:53] Sorry, I'm

[10:54] getting the coughs

[10:54] Ian: No, it's been, so fun. It's been so fun to see that. And in a way, like if you get people saying to you like, Janet, what on earth are you doing, this is a completely nuts idea, you're probably onto the

[11:07] know, yeah,

[11:09] The way that you can bring in together all of those skills that you have into that and it's been awesome to see.

[11:17] we'll see if we can get a few clips from you that we can put into the video. That'd be really cool. I'm just aware of time. we've, it's been so good to talk to you, to hear all of this. It's been really inspiring. I know that listeners and viewers will, I'd love to hear your story. so what.

[11:35] Obviously you're doing the singing striders. What's, happening with that? And what, are you working on at the moment? What's, the, big thing that you're doing right

[11:45] Janet: I set up, Singing Striders as a community interest company. My biggest challenge is there's only one of me, so And it's quite replicable because we have a backing track and, we have a set of backing tracks and, lyrics and stuff. And, so potentially another me in another area could run their own group and, but I need some funding.

[12:05] I'd really like to, expand that next year. I've, and I was beating, I've been beating myself up about not doing more with it this year. then I've got my, my business. I have to confess, I do feel a bit, I've started, So I've got my Courageous Business kind of bundle. I've got my Courageous Business Club.

[12:26] and, but there's a part of me that feels a little bit unsure about exactly where things are heading. Like I know what's going on for the next couple of years. but I feel like I'm, I'm ready for a change and maybe the change will be the Singing Striders, maybe it will be something else, but I don't know about you, but I think I've, got a 10, it's about 10 years since I left journalism fully, and I think I've got about a 10 year shelf life.

[12:56] I think I, I feel like I need to do something like different. I've thought of lots of different things. funeral celebrant, wedding celebrant. I've, I've, even thought about retraining, like to be a proper running coach for some sort of fitness thing, but I think that was just like a short fad, whatever.

[13:18] but I, yeah, I'm, I know what's happening for the next 12 months, but I'm yeah, I'm waiting for inspiration to strike a little bit, but I think I definitely need to. need to move elsewhere, but for the time being you can find me at janetmurray. co. uk And see what you find there when you listen back Yeah,

[13:45] Ian: I'm just aware of your voice. You've been, you've done very well in, in speaking for all this, length of time. Thank you so much, Janet. do check out Janet's website and you can connect with her on all the socials as well.

[14:00] thank you John

[14:01] Janet: thank you, thanks very much.

[14:03] Ian: and thank you so much for plugging us into your ears or watching us on the YouTubes and until next time I encourage you to be smart with your ADHD.

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